In Soviet Russia! People were much more finacially secure than they are now.

What begins with "f" and ends with "uck"? A curse word.

anus soup

What does does an elephant and a grape have in common? They are both grapes except for the elephant.

a fat black man walks into an aquarium he enjoyed his day viewing many sea animals while buying a souvenier on his way out.

If life gives you melons ... You might be dyslexic

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Waking up with a snapping turtle up your butt.

Why did the hooker go to the bathroom? Because she just exchanged sex for money and was cleaning herself up for her next trick.

Why did the pie cross the road? I have no idea, why not ask it?

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and and no legs in front of a door? A: A quadruple amputee.

what is red and looks like blue paint? red paint.

Knock Knock. Go away!

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas don't scream when you put them in the oven.

what did the man with no legs get for Christmas? A piano

Why couldn't the cat eat it's food? It's face was stapled to the floor.

A Starfish walks into a bar. He sits down next to a man with a concussion. Q: What did the man say? A: Nothing because he was in a concussion and was no longer able to say words.

Q: What do you call a gray box without a joke in it? A: I don't know but you'd better think of something.

there where 3 guys at a magic pool. if you jump in and say anything it appears in the pool. the first guy runs, jumps and says money!! he gets a bunch of money. the second guy runs, jumps and says gold!! he gets a bunch of gold. the third guy runs, slips says SHIT!!!! and lands in the pool.

why did the chicken cross the road? it didn't it got hit by a bus.

why do black people like basketball? because it envolves running shooting and stealing

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, he didn't my car got to him first.

what do you call a black guy in a house? a burglar

What do you call a black kid on a bike ? Dirt bike

Why did the Black Man only eat one apple a day? He was trying to stay healthy. On an unrelated note he was under the poverty line, and addicted to an illegal substance. He does not represent African-American society very well.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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