What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Cos crossing the road usually doesn't work out too well for chickens.

What's funnier than 24? 25.

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

What did the baby said to her mother? Nothing because she aborted him

What do you call a Mexican mixed with a platypus? a pineapple

Kate

q: whats fat hairy and always eats mcdonalds a playboy model i lied about everything

Example of a pro gamer: A kid who gets all F's in gradeschool, dosent goto collage, gets fat, dies alone.

How do you keep children off your front lawn? You molest them.

what did the catholic priest say to the little boy? -probably something about god or jesus because they are in church

you want to hear a joke? sure... too bad

A man asked a friend at work if he could have $100, his friend replied "sure I'll give it to you when pigs fly", that man never received $100 dollars from his friend.

What do you call cheese that's not yours? STOLEN! You're under arrest.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks: "why that long face?" The horse, being a horse, thus not being able to comprehend the complexities of a conversation, says nothing and then shits on the floor.

How do you know that a woman is having an orgasm? They go like OH YAH OH YAH:D

Knock knock. Nobody answers because the homeowner was out of the house at the time.

Pickle!

Knock Knock Who's There? Bad-mannered Bad-mannered who? F*ck Off

Do you think retarded people know that they are retarded? I don't know, you tell me. Wait a second....did you just call me retarded? They are clueless.

Q: Why can't Helen Keller drive? A:Because she is a woman A: She is blind deaf and dumb A: No seriously because she is dead.

Why did Justin Bieber smile in his mug shot? He did not understand the consequences of his horrible actions that could have killed many innocent men, woman, or children and, in jail, there could be very dangerous people living there.

Penis

Once upon a time, there was boy. I saw this boy. So I sat on him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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