Whats better than winning a gold in the special olympics? Not being a retard

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A man in a restaurant says "Waiter! What's this fly doing in my soup?" The waiter apologizes and offers to comp the meal.

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I would write a joke, but it wouldn't be funny

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Whats the difference between the floor and the ceiling? One of them is higher!

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So these two guys are in this barn f!@#$%^ this owl! no terms of service were available but i posted anyway cuz i just didnt want the best anti to be missed!

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What is black, white and hungry? A woman with a rare skin disorder known as Vitiligo which causes discolourtion of the skins pigment in patches; who is hungry.

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say it aloud and fast: •im sofa king stew ped •ice bank mice elf •alpha Q •mike hunt •mike ock

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a Triceratops. What's worse than being raped by a Triceratops? Being gang raped by a herd of Triceratops.

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why didnt the boys drink the coffee? because she coughed on it

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Knock Knock Who's there? I'm from the Department of Child Services, i'm here to take your children.

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" Not the best move Anne Frank ever made.

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What's the worst thing to find in an empty box? Nothing,It's empty

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How many militant feminist does it take to change a lightbulb? 2, one to change the bulb and another to suck my dick.

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What did the 16 year old boy say to the obese girl who failed at typing? "sucks for you bitch-face."

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What does the Christian celebrate on Christmas? Christmas

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Q: why is the squirrel stuck in the tree? A: because he should have finished high school.

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What do you call a girl with 2 brains? Pregnant

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Dinosaur!

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I know you are but what am I? A queer.

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A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

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What did my mom say when she walked in my room? You smell like body oder.

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There was a golfer at the field where people usually golf. he had a golf club. so did the man next to him. The man i spoke of first hit the guy that was next to him with a golf club. Why? because he was angry at the man for shoving socks down his daughters throat and extracted her eyes with a melon scooper. This should not be humorous, the girl got blood and eye juice on her fathers new shoes when she came home.

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Yeah, you cant make nukes without certain components which are illegal to come by, you know Iranian Uranium I believe, I still feel pretty ill, if you dont mind, lets change the subject. Say, does the word yellowcake mean anything to you?

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what do u get when you cross a kangaroo and an elephant a genetically disformed animal comes out who dies shortly after

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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