What did one rock say to the other rock? Nothing, rocks are inanimate objects, therefore rendering them unable to participate in the activity of speech.

What's red and puts out fires? A fire truck? Oh, you've heard this joke before.

Q: Where does a hooker go for her footlong? A: Subway

They say under Chuck Norris's beard, is just a chin.

What happened to the chicken who crossed the road ? Quite obviously he got to the other side to be greeted by a 50 foot half man half chicken who had one leg.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side why didnt the chicken cross back? for the first time in his life, Clucky the chicken, felt liberated. his cruel life flashed before his eyes, forcing him to remember all the bad tines he had spent on the McKinley farm. all the eggs stolen from him, watching all his friends being taken for slaughter. it all came back. from the other side of the road, Clucky saw a place he never wanted to go back to, a place he wanted to forget. the day he chose not to cross back was the first real day in Clucky's life.

Fruitcake

whats the difference between a pizza and a jew -a pizza is food

So I went to the airport the other day, and the new TSA regulations are very strict.

How do you know that a woman is having an orgasm? They go like OH YAH OH YAH:D

"Oh yeah?!" "Yeah!" "You wanna go?!" "No, sorry. I got plans." (walks away)

What starts with C and ends with UNT. Ciretrunt

Your mama's so fat, that at her last annual checkup her attending physician informed her that it would be in her best interest to diet and exercise before her obesity manifested itself in a variety of chronic afflictions that would detract from her ability to lead a long life.

Knock knock. Nobody answers because the homeowner was out of the house at the time.

What's worse than forgetting a punchline?

How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Wanna go for a bike ride??

Women's rights

A fat man walks into a bar. There is a 70% chance his mom is fat.

Q: Why did the boy cry? A: He was denied access into heaven

a man eats at a restaraunt alone, because all the people he loved died in a tragic boating accident while he was out of town on a business trip

Yo mama so fat even Dora couldn't explore her!

Why did the man cross the inerstate? Well, he only got half way till he got hit by a truck, but he wanted to, it was suicide. oh ya, it wasnt a man it was a chicken. oh well. They are both dead.

What do iPhones and Nokias have in common The nokia is indestructible. I lied about the iPhone

Golf.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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