What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas don't scream when you put them in the oven.

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Slavery

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What do you call a fish without an eye? fsh.

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Hello, ladies, look at your man, now back to me, now back at your man, now back to me. Sadly, he isn’t me, but if he stopped using ladies scented body wash and switched to Old Spice, he could smell like he’s me. Look down, back up, where are you? You’re on a boat with the man your man could smell like. What’s in your hand, back at me. I have it, it’s an oyster with two tickets to that thing you love. Look again, the tickets are now diamonds. Anything is possible when your man smells like Old Spice and not a lady. I’m on Sarah Jessica Parker.

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why did the boy buy a dirty magizine? he should not have, its been on the floor. who wants to read the rolling stone magizine if it has dirt on it. how dumb of him.

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Freedom of Speech

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what did the hungry Ukrainian man say to his mother? "? ????? ???????? ?????????? ? ????. ?? ? ??????? ? ??????"

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What did your father say before he died? Nothing, he's already dead

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Pandas Everywhere!!!

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What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Raped

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Why couldn't the cat drink its milk? Because its ears were nailed to the floor.

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Your mom is so stupid that... She often makes mistakes.

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What do you get when you cross Arsene Wenger with Darth Vader? Arsene Vader

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why did the 14 year old girl cross the road? to get an abortion of the child she became impregnated with after getting raped.

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How do I recover from my Pokémon addiction? Catch 'em All!

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why did the chicken cross the road.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why did the man jump off the bridge? He was clinically depressed and wanted to commite suicide

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? A pilot.

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Why is the dinosaur yellow? He's not.

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why is there a hole in the wall, i hope a prehistoric mole doesnt come out of that hole in the ball CC

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The procrastinators association meeting has been postponed. - Anonymous

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What did the cheese say to his friend, who was also a cheese, before the cheese took a picture? ''Cheese''.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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