Do you think retarded people know that they are retarded? I don't know, you tell me. Wait a second....did you just call me retarded? They are clueless.

A man walks into a doctor's office. He is diagnosed with cancer. After three years he dies.

What do you call a man who just died 5 minutes ago? Dead.

What do you call a used garden tool? A dirty hoe (not ho)

What does a ghost get when he watches pornography? A boner

He do you get an emo kid to stop cutting himself? Take away his knife.

Why did the guy read anti jokes? because there funny

what's the difference between a babie and a watermelon. one's fun to hit with a hammer. . . ht other ones a watermelon.

what did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? cancer.

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r Dbags n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA *gargle*" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."*runs* JOKES KILL >:}

How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

Knock knock Nobody's home.

What do you call a group of asians? China.

A scottish man having fun

What did the dog say when his family's grandmother came back to life from the dead and ate everyone? Nothing. This is a highly improbable situation, and furthermore, dogs cannot speak.

This one time at band camp....I put a flute in it's proper storage compartment.

Punchline.

Why are Chinese people only allowed one child? Because their government states so.

steves legs

Well, this is fun.

Adam knocks on the door. Eve: who is it? Adam: Don't be silly, just open the f*cking door.

Costello: Who's on first Joe Girardi: Mark Teixeira

The jets are a good team..

Why did the black guy walk into the supermarket and buy 100 bananas? Because he works at the zoo you racist!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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