You better run like your ass is under fire, because it will be if you don't.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I kicked it.

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Costello: Who's on first Joe Girardi: Mark Teixeira

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Why did the man jump off the bridge? He was clinically depressed and wanted to commite suicide

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Why couldn't the black man get home? His car broke down, and Goodyear was closed.

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What's 6 + 9? 15.

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Whats the differance between peanut butter and jam? You can't peanut butter your dick into a chicks ass.

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Rebecca Black sings a song.

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whats funnier than the boy with no arms and legs getting cancer? lebron playing basketball

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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A black guy, mexican, and asian walk into a bar. They leave soon after because they heard the "one about them"

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What's the difference between a woman and a cat? Numerous things

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Brian: farts RJ: Who farted? Brian: Idk Why? Rj: Smells like sweet ass back here

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Wanna hear 2 short jokes and a long joke? Joke, joke , joooooookkkeeee

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Why did the man masturbate? Because there was no one who wanted to partake in sexual intercourse with him.

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Benevolent villain.

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What's similar about a black person and an apple? Nothing, an apple is a fruit. It has nothing to do with hanging from trees.

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A priest, a rabbi and a shaman walk into a bar. Except there is no rabbi and there is no shaman and the bar is actually my 8th birthday party priest is molesting me. And the priest is my dad. My dad molested me. A lot...

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Bob (laughing): Jared fell off of a cliff Jim: What's so funny about that? Bob: Nothing. I'm laughing at the girl that just fell out of a tree into a giant tub of peanut butter!!!

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How did two Jews react when they saw a quarter on the sidewalk? They agreed to donate it to charity.

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Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? No...........

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? It's everybody in the world telling you to stop re-using this joke.

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A horse walks in a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse didn't reply because he was a hoarse horse.

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When is a door not a door? When it was never actually a door in the first place and you just thought, for whatever reason, that i was.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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