A man about to get on a plane forgets to store his utility knife in his bag before the security scan. He is taken to a back room for private questioning and fined.

What's worse than getting raped? Getting raped twice.

What happened when the princess kissed the frog? She died, the frog was highly toxic.

What do you call a one-armed man Whatever his name is

DANA

Ok, So what happens when an Irishman, Rabbi, and a Black guy all walk into a bar. Nothing the Black guys a recovering alcoholic and is supported by his loving family and friends, especially by his son Martin who he promised to stop drinking when he was 7.

What does a ghost get when he watches pornography? A boner

Why did the cat cross the road? He thought he would make it to the other side, but instead was hit by a mini van and soon after died in the bushes from internal bleeding.

Pandas Everywhere!!!

Why did the penguin cross the road? Chicken

This guy was driving in a car with a blonde. He told her to stick her head out the window and see if the blinker worked. She stuck her head out and said, yes.

Why can't you fool an aborted fetus? Because it wasn't born yesterday.

A Starfish walks into a bar. He sits down next to a man with a concussion. Q: What did the man say? A: Nothing because he was in a concussion and was no longer able to say words.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting attacked by an evil demonic llama.

Where was little suzie the day after the house fire? At the hospital, being treated for minor burns.

A Man walks into a bar and orders a scotch. His alcoholism is tearing his family apart

a women picks up her phone and screams! There were 3 missed calls from her mother-inlaw

What do you call a black person in a pool? A black person swimming.

What did the cheese say to his friend, who was also a cheese, before the cheese took a picture? ''Cheese''.

One time I was playing hide and seek with grandma but I couldn't seem to find her. I asked my sister for help and she told me she was hiding in the living room on the shelf. I went into the living room but all I saw was a vase on the shelf. Grandma probably didn't know the game was over so I opened the vase to tell her. To this day she hasn't come out of the vase.

What's brown a sticky? -A stick

A peice of dust floats into a bar. Its a peice of dust so no one notices it.

corey is a nipplepotomus

cheese

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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