God is religiously proven to be real

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What is green but looks like a silver car? A silver car....I lied about the green part.

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How come Jimmy didn't take his math test? Dead babies can't take math tests!

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Why don't women wear watches?...Because the economy is at an all-time low and it would be reasonable to presume that a person couldn't afford an item like this, thus, trying to budget in a watch that could cost anywhere from 50-100$ would be a risky financial move depending on their yearly salary.

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Why couldn't santa eat cookies and milk at little Jimmy's house? He has diabetes and is unable to stray from a strict diet prescribed by his local doctor.

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Three blind men walk into a bar but they were unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from them would be exploitative.

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What do homeless people get for Christmas? Nothing, they are homeless.

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What does a good joke get for Christmas? no laughs.

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What do you call a pickle that is sad? A pickle!????

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Knock knock Who's there? FBI

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Why can't you fool an aborted fetus? Because it was born yesterday.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms.

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Why was the farmer buried in a grave on the top of a hill? He had died and this would be his final resting place.

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if life gives you lemons, make lemonade. unless you only get one lemon, then it really hard to make a good glass..and for that matter, who said you had a juicer? it would be really hard to just squeeze the juice out of a lemon. on top of that, what kind of situation am I in that I would need lemonade? let's say if life gives you lemons, determine the best use of them based on need, local weather and economic status

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Why did the child drop it's lollipop? Because they got hit by a bus.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing... she's ugly

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if it's friday, it must be China

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why was the kid named owen? Because thats what his parents wnted him to be named

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Q: What did the Black Man say to the Mexican Fellow Guy? A: Hello.

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Slavery lol

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? Down Syndrome

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BILLY BOB JAM:KNOCK KNOCK!! BOBERT:WHAT!! BILLY BOB JAM:PIE BOBERT:WHY WOULD I EVEN CARE?!! BILLY BOB JAM:PIE BOBERT:WHY WONT YOU SHUT UP BILLY BOB JAM ORLANDIO STEAK?!!?!?!GET ME OUTTA HERE AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar, the bartender, a known drug smuggler for the Mexican Cartel fires three shotgun rounds. As the bartender reloads Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks first the shotgun out of the man's hands followed by three very quick blows to the head. The bartender goes down unconscious and he is arrested. Though the program is no longer produced, Walker Texas Ranger was a somewhat enjoyable, although poorly written and low budgeted made for television action crime drama series produced from April 21, 1993 to May 19, 2001.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops