Character one: What did the blond say to the horse? Character two: you spelled blonde wrong.

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three men walk into a bar. they are immediately rushed to urgent care due to blunt force trauma

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what did rebecca say to sabrina ? CALL wass !!

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What's wrong with him? He lit the flashlight at both ends.

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What did one rock say to the other rock? Nothing, rocks are inanimate objects, therefore rendering them unable to participate in the activity of speech.

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What's red and puts out fires? A fire truck? Oh, you've heard this joke before.

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Why did polly fall of her swing ??? She had no arms

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Q: Where does a hooker go for her footlong? A: Subway

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They say under Chuck Norris's beard, is just a chin.

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What happened to the chicken who crossed the road ? Quite obviously he got to the other side to be greeted by a 50 foot half man half chicken who had one leg.

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Fruitcake

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side why didnt the chicken cross back? for the first time in his life, Clucky the chicken, felt liberated. his cruel life flashed before his eyes, forcing him to remember all the bad tines he had spent on the McKinley farm. all the eggs stolen from him, watching all his friends being taken for slaughter. it all came back. from the other side of the road, Clucky saw a place he never wanted to go back to, a place he wanted to forget. the day he chose not to cross back was the first real day in Clucky's life.

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How can you avoid being hit by a car? Don't get in the way.

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whats the difference between a pizza and a jew -a pizza is food

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Why couldn't Jimmy ride a bike Jimmy is a goldfish

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A man and a woman are in bed together and really want to do something, what is that something? Sleep.

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"Oh yeah?!" "Yeah!" "You wanna go?!" "No, sorry. I got plans." (walks away)

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Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

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What type of movies do pirates watch? None they are on a boat!

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Women's rights

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A fat man walks into a bar. There is a 70% chance his mom is fat.

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A women gets on a bus, the bus driver says 'that is the ugliest baby i have ever seen!' the women pays for her ticket and sits on one of the seats while the bus pulls off.

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What smells like curry and bombs? A dead Indian

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Why'd the girl commit suicide? Because Justin Bieber admitted he was gay.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops