DERP

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Two business men, a priest and three boys are on a plane which is going down. There are only three parachutes. One business man says that they should allow the children to have the parachutes as they have long lives ahead of them. The other business man says screw the children. The priest looks up at the second business man. After a short but heated argument they all agree to let the children have the parachutes. The three children then proceed to jump out of the plane with the parachutes. The two business men and the priest watch as they descend upon the earth. The plane then crashes into a mountain, killing the business men and the priest. Once the boys were safely on land they went back to their daily lives in their individual homes. Turns out a serial killer had escaped from prison, all three children were found dead the next morning, the cause of death of course being that each had contracted some form of a sexually transmitted disease from the priest.

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Why did the guy read anti jokes? because there funny

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A Man walks into a bar and orders a scotch. His alcoholism is tearing his family apart

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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I had sex with the Earth, and out came global warming...Imagine what will happen if i had sex with Obama?

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why did the 14 year old girl cross the road? to get an abortion of the child she became impregnated with after getting raped.

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An asian kid in a classroom starts to squint to try to see the board that is far away. A white man looks at the kid and asks, "Hey asian, is it hard for you to see that board?" The Asian replies, "Yes, yes it is."

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A very busty blond and a priest walk into a bar. The bartender asks with a smile, "What'll be today, pastor?" "Wine. please."

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Why did the man go to space? He was a highly trained astronaut

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Two parrots are in a cage. The one looks at the other one and says, "answer the phone," and the other one says, "where are my car keys."

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what did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? cancer.

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What blue and red? poop in a saggy bag

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Duncan Traywick is hilarious.

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This post contains NOTHING.

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YO momma is so fat she suffers from cardiovascular illnesses.

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how to you kill an Irish midget? You don't as murder is illegal and discriminating against a certain type of person is racist.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't; by the time Keller owned her first dog, she was an adult with exceptional communicative abilities for one with her condition. She frequently wrote about her beloved dogs and is even credited with introducing the Akita breed to the United States. If her dog had run away, it would be unlikely that she would have been allowed further dogs.

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to the one below me. YEAH RIGHT!!!!!!!!!!

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Why did the man throw the clock out the window? Because he overslept and missed a job interview and a chance to support his family.

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Knock knock Who's there? FBI

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My mom.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is a woman

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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