What do you call a old guy watching little kids in a pool? a life guard

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Laws are initially proposed in Parliament as bills. They become Acts after being approved three times by Parliamentary votes and then receiving Royal Assent from the Governor-General. The majority of bills are promulgated by the government of the day (that is, the party or parties that have a majority in Parliament). It is rare for government bills to be defeated, indeed the first to be defeated in the twentieth century was in 1998. It is also possible for individual MPs to promote their own bills, called member's bills; these are usually put forward by opposition parties, or by MPs who wish to deal with a matter that parties do not take positions on.

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What's worse than a male chauvinist pig? A woman that won't do what she's told.

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Why did Suzy drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Suzy!

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what makes white men feel embarrassed and and ashamed? when they find out their girllfriend has been sleeping with a black man.

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Im not racist i love black people i have 5 of them.

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What's long, hard and full of seamen? A submarine.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? I was eating an orange in the park last week when I saw four men brutally murdered before my very eyes.

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Why did lady gaga set her alarm? So she could get up in the morning.

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Roses are blue, Violets are green, I am color blind, You have cancer.

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Why do Jews have big noses? Because it is genetic.

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A black man is playing guitar for a white man and a chinese man. After he is finished playing the white man and chinese man compliment him on his nice playing.

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What does Mickey mouse do every day? Minnie mouse

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Wanna hear a joke? No.

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You know what happens when you assume. You jump to a conclusion that could conceivably have severe consequences.

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Q. How do you make an atheist appreciate life? A. Break his legs.

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Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness ... Hello?

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What is wrong with racism? A lot of things.

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a car? A lot.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side why didnt the chicken cross back? for the first time in his life, Clucky the chicken, felt liberated. his cruel life flashed before his eyes, forcing him to remember all the bad tines he had spent on the McKinley farm. all the eggs stolen from him, watching all his friends being taken for slaughter. it all came back. from the other side of the road, Clucky saw a place he never wanted to go back to, a place he wanted to forget. the day he chose not to cross back was the first real day in Clucky's life.

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What's red and puts out fires? A fire truck? Oh, you've heard this joke before.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Hodor

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What did the 5 year old girl ask Santa for Christmas? A pony.

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What time is it? 12:19. weren't we supposed to leave like 5 minutes ago? 4. For the mall...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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