Hitler walks into a bar and is shot on sight

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Women's rights

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What's white and black and red all over? Slaughtered Cows.

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. Just kidding. He's paralyzed

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her 64 times in the chest.

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I won the game.

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what's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm ? finding a half worm.

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Why did the fat black guy fail his eye exam? He's blind.

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Knock Knock? WHAT?!?!?

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What is the same about a plum and an elephant? They're both grey except the plum

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Why did Justin Bieber smile in his mug shot? He did not understand the consequences of his horrible actions that could have killed many innocent men, woman, or children and, in jail, there could be very dangerous people living there.

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What did the policeman say to the man accused of murder? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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why didn't the kid win the talent show? He wasn't talented.

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Why did the black man run? There was a mass murderer chasing him with a chainsaw.

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Why do black people ride Septa? Because septa is an affordable and convenient means of transportation.

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Dallas Cowboys

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A man walks into a bar, he drinks, then leaves the bar.

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Two business men, a priest and three boys are on a plane which is going down. There are only three parachutes. One business man says that they should allow the children to have the parachutes as they have long lives ahead of them. The other business man says screw the children. The priest looks up at the second business man. After a short but heated argument they all agree to let the children have the parachutes. The three children then proceed to jump out of the plane with the parachutes. The two business men and the priest watch as they descend upon the earth. The plane then crashes into a mountain, killing the business men and the priest. Once the boys were safely on land they went back to their daily lives in their individual homes. Turns out a serial killer had escaped from prison, all three children were found dead the next morning, the cause of death of course being that each had contracted some form of a sexually transmitted disease from the priest.

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I had sex with the Earth, and out came global warming...Imagine what will happen if i had sex with Obama?

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How do you make $10,000 in 1 day? I don't know, but I wish I did.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? I don't cum on my watermelon before I eat it.

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Why did the man go to space? He was a highly trained astronaut

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How do you get a nun pregnant? You have sex with her.

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How did two Jews react when they saw a quarter on the sidewalk? They agreed to donate it to charity.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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