Why don't seagulls live in the bay? Because then they'd be bagels

A gay guy walks into a bar. Nothing is said to him, because homosexuality is accepted in this area.

What did the little boy say when he was sick? Nothing. He stayed in bed and slept all day.

What's the best part about Africa? Nothing.

a woman asked her husband, why havent you been talking to me? the man answers, you are having an affair so i ignored you and only talked to the girl im cheating on you with. you should know your a horrible person

What do you call a monkey? A monkey.

Why did the man fall over screaming? Because he got shot in the leg

Why doesn't Santa have any children? Because Santa doesn't exist.

What's worse than seeing your goldfish die? Watching your grandfather have a stroke.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house?  No Neither has he

-What do you get when you graph the division of x by the square root of 69? - I don't know, what? -I was asking you, as my family's low economic status hinders my ability to buy a graphing calculator.

Once upon a time there was beautiful princess, ONCE!

How do you win a war? Drop a fridge on your enemies.

Why'd the girl commit suicide? Because Justin Bieber admitted he was gay.

Why does your mom moan and scream at night? She had a rough childhood, filled with all types of despair and disappointment.

What does a baseball and a T-Rex have in common? What? Neither of them is a carrot.

What happened when a black man's phone went off? He answered it.

What is the same about a plum and an elephant? They're both grey except the plum

What's that smell? Your grandmother being burned alive.

What is worse but similar to Jenga? The September 11th attacks.

Dale a tu cuerpo alegria Macarena

What's worse than dropping your ice cream on the floor? Getting the end of your penis stapled

Man: Drink this. Man 2: Ok. (Drinks it) Man; You drank a powerful substance that is 20000 times stronger than hydrochloric acid! Man2: Oh FUCK! Kelvin Yang.

penis

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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