Last week, I saw a film. As I recall it was a horror film.

what do you call a fish with no gills? I dont know what youd call that creature...but its no fish.

Why does Michael J. Fox make a great milkshake? Because he's had a successful career where he has made a substantial amount of money, allowing him to purchase high quality ingredients.

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he's dead

Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is too sparsely populated and not economically viable.

Women's rights

Freedom of Speech

What did the robot say to the centipede? STOP BEING A CENTIPEDE!!!! It's funny cause the robot ain't got no arms.

a black guy leaves prison

Q: Why did the girl fall of her swing? A: She was hit by a rogue fridge. Q: Why didn't she get back up? A: She was quite badly injured.

tim tebow is a great quarterback

Whats the definition of helpless? A quadraplegic in a washing machine

A person with OCD walked into a abr.

which of the following is right -the yoke is white -the yoke are white neither the yoke is yellow

What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? My ass.

What happens if Pinoccio says my nose is about to grow?

why did the chicken cross the road? who knows, we cannot read an animals (or a human for that matter) mind. Perhaps, though unlikely as he's a chicken, he saw a friend across the road or a child who wants to stroke him. Perhaps he is trying to escape being used as a circus act or being cooked for a supermarket. We cannot complain if the chicken wishes for a better life. Anyway, we shall never know why the chicken decided to cross the road, and never will, as it is dead after being hit by a car.

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r Dbags n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA *gargle*" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."*runs* JOKES KILL >:}

Why don't blind people skydive? They do.

Why do Africans live in slums Because they have aids

Three soldiers, one Japanese, one American, and one Italian were stuck in a desert. How did they escape? A rescue squad of thirty trained troops came down in a helicopter and brought them each to their respective homes except the Italian who was actually a Mafia boss so they put him in prison.

What's the difference between medicine and astronomy ? They're different fields of studies.

What do you get when you cross Arsene Wenger with Darth Vader? Arsene Vader

Rose's Are Red Violet's are Blue You Should Be In A Zoo Dont Worry Ill Be There Too But I Wont Be In A Cage With You Ill Be Laughing At You.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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