Q: What's big and white and can't climb trees? A: a fridge

Why couldn't the orphans go on the field trip? Their parents couldn't sign the permission slip.

whats slower then a turtle A FATTY

what's hard and pink going in a soft and wet coming out Gum

womens rights

Q: What did the Miracle Whip say when the refrigerator door was opened? A: Nothing. Miracle Whip cannot speak.

What's the opposite of fly? To not fly

What do you call a man with no legs? A paraplegic.

Womens rights. Are extremely valuable because women are equal.

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

there was an owl, she had a baby, threw up, then died

How do you kill a blue elephant, with a blue elephant gun, how do you kill a pink elephant, you strangle it until it turns blue and shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

Wana hear something dirty? Mud

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken probably crossed the road because of some sort of impulse or external stimuli (most likely a bug or a worm located on the other side of the road) in which he or she responded to by proceeding to cross the road in order to get to the other side as chickens have a sense of cause to effect in which the effect would be consuming the bug or other living life form.

What do iPhones and Nokias have in common The nokia is indestructible. I lied about the iPhone

How do you make a black man cry? Kill his family

Penis

Women rights.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

Jim and Larry work together. Jim works hard, and Larry is a bit of a prankster. One day, Jim is having a rather rough day, and Larry looks to cheer him up with a good-natured joke. Knowing that Jim's wife prepares dinner for him every night of the week, he calls her and tells her that their boss has decided to pay for a dinner out, that she should take the day off and just get ready for Jim to come home and pick her up. Larry will later follow up by calling a pizza delivery place and having them send a special no hard feeling message with two large delicious pizzas. He forgets to call the pizza delivery man until later that night, after which it's too late and he thinks "I'll just explain the joke to Jim tomorrow." And goes peacefully to sleep. Arriving home and finding that dinner is not prepared, Jim savagely beats his wife.

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Why did Tina's parents stop calling her? Because they died

whats stupid, retarded, and dumb an Erin Perri.

Why shouldn't women wear watches? Because there's a clock on their cell phones.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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