Why do birds suddenly appear? If you were more observant, you would notice they usually approach gradually.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Person 1: Do you like impressions? Person 2: Yes! P1: Why? ... P1: That was Socrates.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q: where did the pickle live? A: In the desert

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's a rabbit's favourite food? No-one knows, like humans, every rabbit has it's own favourite food.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why was the monkey on the floor? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing... she's ugly

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Think of a number between -1 and 1 That's how many friends you have

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Hitler

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A member of the KKK is walking along the street enjoying the nice weather. He then turns his attention to a black man on the other side of the street and stopped dead in his tracks. He stepped on a land mine.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

If Pythagoras was racist, he would have made hypotenuses.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why couldn't the girl charge her phone? The charger wasn't plugged in.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Chuck Norris walks into a bar, the bartender, a known drug smuggler for the Mexican Cartel fires three shotgun rounds. As the bartender reloads Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks first the shotgun out of the man's hands followed by three very quick blows to the head. The bartender goes down unconscious and he is arrested. Though the program is no longer produced, Walker Texas Ranger was a somewhat enjoyable, although poorly written and low budgeted made for television action crime drama series produced from April 21, 1993 to May 19, 2001.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? I was eating an orange in the park last week when I saw four men brutally murdered before my very eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Whats worse than one pregnancy scare... two pregnancy scares...whats worse than two pregnancy scares? being forced to having consensual sex with a grizzly bear.

thumb_up thumb_down -114

Q: What did the cop say to the deaf man? A: Nothing worth hearing about.

thumb_up thumb_down -134

A man buys free health care...

thumb_up thumb_down +97

Why did the girl's cat fall from the ceiling? Because she didn't use enough tape.

thumb_up thumb_down +65

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? With the technology of compact fluorescent light bulbs they don't go out for much longer, so the question is nearly irrelevant.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

What happened to the chicken who crossed the road ? Quite obviously he got to the other side to be greeted by a 50 foot half man half chicken who had one leg.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

Why did the little girl fail her test? She had mental retardation.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

I tried to post an unfunny punch-line-less joke on anti-joke. It worked and I got tons of emotional affirmation from it and stuff, so thanks.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

So I walked upstairs and I told the guy, "No." And he then asks, "Why?"

thumb_up thumb_down +51

A man walked into the white house and security escorted him out because he didn't have a pass.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Yo mama so poor... that she possesses substantially less money than the average person working hard in order to accumulate money today.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops