Steve is getting paid $29.50 to bounce a ball Steve is getting fired monday

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Phoebe: Joey, it's a birthday party. Joey: Yeah, but for a one year old. What's the point? The other day, she laughed for like an hour at a cup. Just a cup with a picture of Elmo on it dressed as a farmer. And he's standing next to this cow. And the cow says...."Elmoooo!" Joey: *starts to laugh* Yeah...that's a funny cup.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

wife: why are women's feet smaller husband: so they can stand closer to the kitchen sink

thumb_up thumb_down +1

In soviet Russia...things are different

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the physicist say when he got his penis stuck in a test tube? Ah jeesh! I got my penis stuck in a test tube.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A man walks into a bar. Splash.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Roses are stools, Violets are bums, sugar is knit, thank you, LSD.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock Knock Who's there Boo Boo who Boo I'm a ghost atleast act scared

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q:whats big white and falls out of trees A:a refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bigger worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A blonde walks out of a hair salon She had just dyed her hair.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: what did the man with no eyes get for Chrismas? A: Reading glasses

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the tramp get for Christmas? Nothing because he's Jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: What do you call a innocent black man that was shot 403 times by the cops when they asked for his ID and somehow assumed he was gonna reach for a gun? A: Deceased Texan.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

how many flys in a box six --sticksack

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why can't Julius Caesar use a cell phone? Because he is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What happened to the lady? She queefed.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q. Whats black and red all over? A. A black wall thats been painted red.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q How is it Going Patty? A:Hi Patrick hows it going?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a dear with no eyes? A no-idear

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops