What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

The other day a male African American approached me in a less than reputable neighborhood after dark and inquired as to whether or not I had a dollar which I could spare. I politely told him I didn't and apologized. He forgave me and we went our seperate ways.

Why shouldn't you try to pick up a live scorpion with your teeth? Because it could easily sting your face, or mouth.

Why did the little girl pull her hair out? She didn't, It's a side-effect of the chemotherapy.

When life throws you lemons, Throw grenades.

What do you call a man who's being followed by 18 black guys? Dave, he's going to work and is stuck in traffic

Scratch and Sniff [________] smells like glass doesn't it?

A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

What makes us laugh? Definitely not this joke!

Keith figured gasoline burns, doesn't it? He was wrong.

Why did the pelican cross the road? The man did not reply because his mother recently died in a car accident while crossing the road. She also loved pelicans.

What did the black man say tovtye chinese man? Hello sir how are you today?

What did the cricket say to the fox? Cricket.

whats funny about four dead horses in a park ? the horses are dead!

What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill.

What do you call a penguin sliding down a hill how should i know.

What do you call an alligator in a circus? Testicular Cancer.

What is worse than getting hit by a car? Getting hit by a truck

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

Yo momma so fat that they've diagnosed her with type 2 diabetes and she has an extremely elevated risk of heart disease. You should really encourage her to try and eat better and get more exercise.

Pilot: We need to lighten the load of this plane Italian: I'll throw out these pizzas, there are too many of them in my country Mexican: I will throw out these tacos, there are just too many of them in my country The american stares in horror at the two men, the pizza and tacos were their only food and they were lost in the Himalayas.

Ask me if I am a tree. "Are you a tree?" No.

Little Johnny was walking through the park... only he had no legs. Little Johnny was raped later that day... while he bled out from him having his legs cut.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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