Whats green has 4 legs and would kill someone if it fell out of a tree??? A pool table.....

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A man walks in to a bar with a frog stapled to his head. The bar tender says What the heck is that. The frog says I don't know this thing has been coming out of my but for two days

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Yo mama so fat when she goes to the gym, she makes her trainer skinnier.

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what smells like red paint, looks like red paint and is called red paint? A pear, i lied about everything i just said

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Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

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What did the farmer say after the chicken started talking? Holy shit a talking chicken

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boling water: why is it taking so long for you to get hard? egg: sorry, it's just because i recently got laid by a chick.

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What did billy get after sex? Herpes

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Why did the girl make a sandwich for her boyfriend? Because she offered to make lunch in order to save money by not going to a restaurant.

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how do you kill a blond? there are many ways but every one of them is illegal and could be criminally chargeable.

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WELCOME TO THE GARLIC BOYS SHOW! So kids, what are we gonna eat today? POTATOES! FUUUUUUU! Moral: You say tomata, I say WROOOOOOOONG, you say cheap I say your mother.

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What's green and can dance? A Cloud. I lied.

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What is white and weighs twice as much as Shamoo? My ass.

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How many women can fit on a bus? It depends on the size of the bus.

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What's grammatically incorrect about this sentence? Nothing. I lied.

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What kind of movies do pirates like? They don't know, Somalia doesn't have much of a film industry.

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Person 1: Happy Halloween! Person 2: Hey, I'm Jewish

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Why did the man feel like he was flying? Because he had just committed suicide by jumping off of a tall building.

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How do you make a lumberjack cry? Kill his family

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Why did Sarah fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.... Knock, Knock, Who's there?: Not Sarah

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My name is Jacob Mckeand and my penis is as long as Mr. Macs hair.

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A good antijoke? Going to the last few pages of the "Popular" antijoke section....

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What do you call a black person doing labor for other people? A good friend.

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Knock knock It's open, come in

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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