Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

Why couldn't the cat drink it's milk? Because it didn't have a face.

I think everybody should have a penis.

Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

Every first letter of an innappropriate body part is how it actually looks like: Penis, Vagina, Boobs

Q: What do you call a vacuum that doesn't suck stuff up? A: A broken vacuum.

Why did Little Timmy eat Smarties before school? Because he was hungry.

One time I said to my friend, "There are too many black people in this country." I forgot he was black.

Q: When did the man realize it was 5:00am? A: When it became 5:00am.

Jerry: Hi what's your name? Bob: My name is bob. Jerry: Bob, nice to meet you, my name is Jerry. Bob: Nice to meet you Jerry.

A woman who owns a parrot leaves her home, forgetting that a plumber is scheduled to come fix her sink. A few minutes after she leaves, the plumber arrives and knocks on the door. The parrot calls out "WHO IS IT?" The plumber replies, "It's the plumber. I've come to fix the sink." The plumber waits for a minute and, seeing that nobody has come to the door, knocks again. The parrot calls out "WHO IS IT?" The plumber replies, a little more loudly, "It's the plumber. I've come to fix the sink!" The plumber waits for a minute and bangs hard on the door. The parrot calls out "WHO IS IT?" The plumber screams, "IT'S...THE...PLUMBER!!! I'VE...COME...TO...FIX...THE...SIIIIIINK!!!" Just then, the plumber clutches his chest and falls dead to the ground. When the woman returns home, she sees the dead man in front of her door. She opens her door to go to her phone and asks the parrot, "who is it?" The parrot replies, "WHO IS IT?"

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she was hit by a refrigerator.

What do you call a black person that plays golf? Jack, his name is Jack.

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "Yeah, but you make a really great sandwich!"

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenic, and don't have any friends

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

why did the black man drink grape kool-aid kool-aid refreshed him after a hard days work out in the field picking cotton

Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are yellow Grass is green

-How much wood would a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood? -Probably a decent amount.

Why was Hellen Keller a bad driver? She was a woman

roses are red, violets are blue, open your legs and give me an hour.

Why do people make jokes about cancer? Oviously to get thier ass kicked!!! -BY:KOLBY HOOKS

Q. what tall and looks like a jew? A.TODD

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? That's not funny.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...