Why did the child drop it's lollipop? Because they got hit by a bus.

What did the baby get for his 1st birthday? Nothing, he was a Harlequin baby, therefore dying during the last stages of pregnancy.

2 muffins are in an oven. One says to the other, "it's really hot in here!" the other replies, "WHOA. A talking muffin!"

Whats worst then the Holocaust? Two holocaust's.

how do you make sure someone is dead shoot them

Situation. A man trying to find meaning in his life. Question. Why are desieses not colorful, and tasty. Answer. Adolf Hitler and his ice cream songs that he sings on sunday mornings during brunches.

Q. Why did billy die? A. Becuase everyone dies in life

What is the difference between a Jew and a Pizza? One is food the other, fuel.

A ship sinks in the middle of the South Pacific, only one man survives. He swims over to a deserted island.

Why did the man burp? Because gases escaped from his stomach and came out of his mouth.

To whomever it may concern, You are currently reading this anonymous letter from someone anonymous. I’m currently watching you read this letter. I am not a threat. I am not Big Brother. I am someone anonymous. You will never find out who I am. You may have a few ideas of who this might be, but you will be wrong. Just know that I am watching you. That is all. I love you. All for Jesus -A

A man and his friend walk into a bar. The first man said to the bartender "I'll have a H2O, please." His friend said "Yeah, I'll have a H2O too." The bartended wasn't an idiot and was aware that he was in a bar, not a science lab, and handed them both a bottle of H2O. His friend still died.

How do you get blood from a stone? Put it in a snowball.

Q: What did the redneck say with missing front teeth? A: "I can only eat things with my back teeth and I have AIDS."

Tim: Jason, your dumb Jason: No I'm not.

What is a mexicans favorite sport? Whatever he is interested in.

Why was the blond looking at the orange juice box? Because she was reading the nutritional content of orange juice.

How do you keep your dog warm? Put antifreeze in its water dish.

if you are what you eat then arent pornstars considered vaginas?

The geese of Growmore

What did the doctor say to his patient? You have cancer

Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say mustache? ...No. I wish you had said mustache.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have candy GET IN THE VAN NOW BEFORE SOMEBODEY SEES US!

Why is the sky red in London? Fire.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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