An armadillo walks into a bar, and shouts "I hear you don't serve armadillos." "That is correct," the bartender replies.

what do chinese kids make for fathers day? shoes

Whats worst then getting a paper cut. Being stabbed by a screw driver.

Knock knock. Whos there? I am you dumbass im standing right next to you.

Roses are red, violets are blue shut the hell up, and sit the hell down

How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting thrown in to a car and raped violently.

why did stuart buy an ipad from the mall. because he wanted an ipad

If you woke up in the morning feeling like P Diddy, get tested. Immediately.

Why couldn't the color blind orphan find his apple? Because he was also blind.

1,2,3,4,5..what comes next? yeah you should know how to count

A middle aged woman walks into a bar. Its Friday and there is a breeze in the air. She leaves shortly thereafter.

How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

-I have an idea! Let's play twenty questions! -Alright! But i have to warn u I have piss running down my leg

A man walks into a bar. Three hours later, ambulances arrived, because the man was knocked out. The man who saved was known as a hero, and was awarded a medal for his good deed.

How do my feet smell? Oh wait. They can't. Feet are not sentient independent beings and therefore cannot experience the five senses, including smell.

- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - What? Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

What's worse than finding ants in your kitchen? A truckload of dead babies.

What do you get if you convict a white man of murder? A black man in prison.

A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. "Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?" The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?" The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch." A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money, I forgot what happens right but it wasn't that funny anyway

What do you call someone with no arms, one leg,and an eye patch? names

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist bastard.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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