Where would a 65 year old man find a young, attractive woman who would take any interest in him? Very likely in a hospital, but that would be a professional interest, not a sexual one.

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How do you kill a Jewish person? You shoot him multiple times in the face

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Why did Ian pass his CRB check? Because he committed his crimes on holiday

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Why did the african kid die He was mauled by a tiger in a zoo

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roses are red violets are blue you little stupid a*s b**ch i aint f***ing with you

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If the blue dog falls out of sample object, how many bananas does my mom eat? No, because markers can't talk

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An anti joke a day... really doesn't actually do that much

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Why did the black man lose his leg? Because he was kidnapped and tortured.

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a cat gets mauled by a dog. it died later that day

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There once was a man from Peru, he dreamt he was eating his shoe, he then woke up, took a shower, changed, and drove to work.

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What's worse than cutting yourself? Deadly tornadeos.

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What's the hardest part about being a pedophile? Fitting in.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Suzie.

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What is black and white and red all over? Interracial sex partners with smallpox.

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Why did the frog commit suicide? Because his mother was a typewriter

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Why was the mohel touching the little boy's penis? Because that's his job!

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Knock knock Who's there? The police, your son just died of terroristic bombing.

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A buddhist walks up to a hotdog stand asks the server to make him one with everything

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Why did the blonde lose her job as a teacher? Because she was in a sudden and violent car crash in which she died a slow agonizing death.

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Why was the truck making noises? It was backing up.

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if you like, i will tell my crush maddy i love her, just kidding i wont do shit.

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how do i know if my husband is cheating? beat him until he tells you

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and he said to the man running the stand, "Hey! Got any grapes?" The man then realized he was hallucinating because ducks are unable to speak proper english.

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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