Why did billy have a frog stapled to his face? Because he was having a bad day.

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Q: Why is Little Johnny in the hospital with a bullet wound and a broken arm? A: I shot him of his bike.

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whats then difference between a jew and a pizza ? A pizza doesnt scream when its put in the oven .

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How do you stop a baby from crawling in circles? Pick it up and put it in a crib, like a responsible parent.

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FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-

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knock knock who's there? F uck F uck who? F uck off

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Why was Michael Jackson so bad at dancing? Because he had a broken leg.

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There was a blonde, brunette and red head driving in a car. The car breaks down so the three of them decide to walk. So the red head takes water bottles, the brunette takes food and the blonde took the car. The red head asked the brunette why she was taking the food, the brunette said "incase i get hungry i can eat" then the brunette asked the red head why she brought water the red head said "incase i get thirsty i can have a drink. Then the brunette asked the blonde why she brought the car the blonde said "to drive home".

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What starts with "P" and ends with "orn"? Popcorn

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

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Why does Larry the Cable Guy get his own T.V. show??? Why can't I have one of my own??? .......ah...forgot....I'm a minority...

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Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the barber shop, which was located on the other side of the road. He then walked to the crosswalk, patiently waited, then crossed when the little person lit up.

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Why did the pregnant Mexican cross the border? Nobody knows. She was shot down on site.

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What do you call a deer with no eye? No eye deer ( get it, it's like the red, necked southern speaking states )

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your mother is so heavily obese, she became one of the 60 million individuals in America who are obese today.

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The dog, Marley from Marley and Me. It died.

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It may be Stupid but its also Dumb. ~Patrick Star

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Ask me Whats 2+2. ? Ok what's 2 plus 2 4 you dumb ass

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did you see stevie wonder's new guitar no neither did he

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What do you call a black man helping an old woman cross the road? A concerned citizen.

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What did the prizon cell mate get for christmas. Herpes!

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What's 1+1? 69.

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What's green, has six legs and lives in the jungle? A Snooker Table.

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What is long, hard, cries a lot, and can't fall down a man-hole? A baby with a javelin through its neck.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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