Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because it saw some food, or because it felt threatened on the side of the road it was already on.

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What's brown and sticky? Feces.

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What did the green grape say to the purple grape? BREATH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

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You're so fake, Barbara Millicent Roberts is jealous of you.

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What's worse than finding a band aid in your Crock-pot? Finding a Crock-pot in your band aid.

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Your moms so dumb that she has cancer..... wait thats racist

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Why is the dog in the driver seat? Why is there birds making you filet mignon? Why is your toe blue? I don't know the answer. Go talk to your doctor

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Your mom is so black, i shot a bullet at her. It came back and said i need a flashlight.

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Did you hear about the Mexican boy scout that helped that old lady cross the border.

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Why was Tommy late for school? He got raped by spiderman.

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Knock Knock, Who's There? Not Ann Frank because she died in the Holocaust along with 6 million other innocent people.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Barack Obama. Ok, come on in Mr. President!

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Guy 1: Ask me if I have a banana in my ear. Guy 2: Do you have a banana in your ear? Guy 1: Sorry I can't hear you I have a banana in my ear

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had gotten out of its coop.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? "Robin, get in the Batmobile."

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A man walks into a bar. I don't remember the rest, but your mother's a whore.

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These Jokes suck.

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Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

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Want to hear the World's shortest joke? Peace. [L]

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Q: What is the difference between a moose and a cow? A: How they're spelled.

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if you don't like this you're gay

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Jack just got his new yellow bicycle. His dad got it for his 12th anniversary. Jack was ecstatic to ride it down his street for the first time. He immediately called his friends Paul and Erick and went for his first ride. The neighbors were in AWE when they saw Jack taking off on his new ride. That day the three friends had one of the best day of their young lives, they went up to the lake, had some peanut ice cream and made fun of Alexia. Jack was in love with his new bike and euphoric that they were reunited and did all their favorite things with an incredible amount of passion. Erick hated his new bike.

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A man finds a lamp and rubs it and a genie pops out and says he'll grant him 3 wishes. The man says "I wish I had a trillion dollars for which I can buy whatever my heart desires" and poof he gets it. The man says "I wish I had a beautiful wife for which I can love forever till the end of time." and poof he gets it. Finally, his 3rd wish he says "I wish I have my own country for which I can rule as king and become the greatest ruler in history." and poof he gets it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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