Wanna hear a joke? Me neither.

Chris is hairy

Hollywood presents: In a world... Where darkness and crime is at every corner... The governments darkest secret... MUST... BE... UNLEASHED! Jack Kirby: So, with this technology I can swallow criminals and gain their abilities? But is there not a lot wrong with this? Hollywood: Meh... Sorry, we are gonna go with The Fast and The Furious 64: Mario Kart style.

5 blondes walk into a bar They all leave very intoxicated and die in a car accident shortly after.

What happened to the little girl who fell into the lake? She was rescued and made a complete recovery.

Whats worse than the holocaust? Sex with helen keller.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Scott Scott who? Scott Henderson. Oh my god Scotty! I haven't seen you since highschool, please come in.

A man drinks a java while using Java His java was hot, making him spill on his laptop Blue screen of death

Want to hear a popular joke? Women's Rights

Wuy are Kenyans so fast? Because due to variations in evolution, people from that part of the world have a better muscle build to run at higher speeds than equally trained athletes from other parts of the world.

Knock Knock Who's There Fat white lady with dreadlocks Fat white lady with dreadlocks who? want to buy some girls scout cookies?

what's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? when you slap a mosquito it stops sucking:)

Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? I can't remember. I have amnesia from when I was hit by a bus as a child.

don't do anything i wouldn't do first

Why dont you greet your friend Jack on a plane? because you will say "hi Jack"

What do you call a black man on the moon?? Never going to happen

knock knock? whose there? i dont know. i dont know who? i dont know.

Incidentally,on the subject of friends, when do you actually classify someone as a friend? Is it: When you have been to each others' house; When you have had an intelligent conversation more than once; When you have stayed for dinner; Or perhaps simply when each has decided that the other is worth the air that they breathe? [L]

Why was the black man running? Because he was playing capture the flag.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue If you think this is gonna rhyme, You're dead wrong.

Q: What did the boy do when his mom asked him to put away his clothes? A: Yes. PS: If that wasn't funny to you, then go f**k off. You clearly don't have any sence of humor and you should see someone about that, like a mental health doctor.

Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

dad said he had to drop the kids off at the pool what does that mean mom? honey it means dad has to take a shit beacuase shit looks like retarded black kids with down sydrome

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My grandmother has degenerative brain disease, We may need to euthanise her.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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