Why did blonde cross the road? She needed to get to work.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the engine wasnt working.

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why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

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A Norwegian, a Swede and a Dane where having a bet on who could swim the furthest without getting wet on their hair. The Swede could have done better... The Dane did surprisingly well. The Norwegian, being bald, was disqualified. Moral: I still have some hair left!

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar and order two beers

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What's the best thing about Windows OS? It's very versatile and can run a wide selection of programs, tools, and games.

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Q: What do you call a room full of black people? A: A Social Gathering.

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Rap. Skate. Smoke.

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Why didn't the lawyer submit the car accident he endured to his local courthouse? He was dying of internal brain damage from the shards of glass lodged in his brain from flying through the windshield.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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A guy walks into a bar. The second guy ducks.

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hows your wife she died 7 years ago really mine too

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Roses are red, violets are blue, take this medication, and call me if you have any symptoms of nausea or heartburn.

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Roses are red, You're a failed abortion, Happy Valentines Day. :D

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Dog Dog wh- wait how did you knock? *mindblown*

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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What do u get when u lick chicken Answer- Your a retard if you did not figure it out it is obviously chicken taste DERP!

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whats flat and useless? the walls of an abandoned house where land prices are increasing and properties are in high demand

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My cake is yummy, It's icing is blue. It will always be mine, Come close and I'll punch you. So stay away from it And you will be safe, But if you dont listen, Prepare ice for your face!

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What's worse than having a gay friend? 9/11.

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Why did the white policeman shoot all the black people in a house and not the white people Because the black guys were holding the white guys hostage

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Have you heats about the Guy who's parents died in à car crash... No He killen himself because of hus parents Deathstars

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A plane crashed in the rainforest. The survivors all buried themselves because no survival equipment was left and they all sought to kill themselves in their deep state of shock and fear.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops