What does an Asian person with 3 eyes have? A birth defect.

Q: Why shouldn't you walk under a ladder? A: Because it could fall on top of you. Be a reasonable human being and just fly OVER the ladder.

Whats white and sticky? Glue.

what do you call a man that has a terminal illness and is named James - James

Yo mama so ugly, she has to work harder than most women to attract men.

you walk into a bar Griffin: 'are you ok'

why did so many people die in the typhoon in the Philippines because they had to finish there math homework

Why are the deserts so dry? Obama

Roses are red. Waffles are blue. Blue Waffle.

An armadillo walks into a bar, and shouts "I hear you don't serve armadillos." "That is correct," the bartender replies.

Whats the difference between the Taliban and a Football Team? I'm not on the football team.

What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

About numbers, it was 180 mg of valium... And I am going to live becausepeople got there in time, my heart never stopped because luck, the doc was only making a joke about me "having ingested enough valium to die at least twice". Sanders, I just got your girlfriend to agree to a threesome, if my banana ever wakes up again, AND WHEN... Thou areth forgiven, btw I sent him a picture of Line`s unshaved vagina, and a note stating: U recognize this? Find out more on horsehead network! Meh His name is Anders something Chattington, yeah for all that know him, guess whose finger is on her unshaven... Yeah, maybe you should not have messed with a guy that can have ANYONE. Ps: Then its your mother, then your sister which is 17 (and pretty 16 is legal here so fuck you Chatty!) and then I SHALL STRIKE THY WITH THE VENGEANCE OF A THOUSAND SUNS! Because you are forgiven, which I cant even remember what means, I mean I know I am typing my experiences here, but thats only because I remember by muscle memory where the buttons are, said the doctor... I can still play Snes emulators... Not, because my numb fingers cant click anything and Line is gone. I TOUCHED HER ALREADY YA KNO! YOU SAW THE PIC, My skin is tan, and... well you know she is here... The best part? She is totally okay with you knowing, sayonara pal, id watch the "fluor" in your mothers pussy the next time you eat it!

What do you call a man with only one eye? Half blind.

a lazy boy sleeps 23/24 hours. what does he do in the remaining hour ? he takes a nap

How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

How do you make a French-man cry? Kill his family.

What kind of mother doesn't do laundry? A dead one.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

knock knock whos there? andy andy who? andy gold hi come in

How did the chewy cross the road ? it was stuck to the chickens foot.

did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

A man walks into a bar owned by horses. The bartender says, "Why the short face?"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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