The man said to his wife love hurts. the wife then progressed with punching in the face.

There once was a girl with only one buttcheek. She couldn't go poop. She died.

What time is it when you run out of ice cream? Time to get more ice cream.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

Roses are red Violets are purple. I just realized that nothing rhymes with "Purple".

What did the man with candy say to the little boy? I have Candy.

why is 6 afraid of 7 because 7 is slenderman and he is chasing 6

Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud…

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

What is blue and has to deal with a vagina. Blue waffle you know who has that Jews But the jews got it from the gassing and the gassing got it from hitlers wifes piss but the blue waffle came from the lesbian she had sex with when she was doing her lesbian phase but the lesbian got it from her father and the father got it from his wife.

Three children had stumbled upon a magic slide. There was a sign on the slide stating that what ever they shouted, they would land in a pool of it at the bottom of the slide. So the first child began sliding and shouted out "JELLY" and sure enough he landed in a large pool of jelly when he reached the bottom of the slide. The next child, so excited to go down the slide began sliding down. She shouted out "LOLLIES" and sure enough she landed in a large pool of sweets and chocolates at the bottom of the slide. Finally, the youngest girl in the group mounted the slide. As she was going down she was enjoying the slide so much that she shouted "POOS POOS" forgetting the rule of the magic slide and finally landing in a large pool of excrement.

A blonde walks into an electronics store. She asks an assistant, "Can I buy that TV"? He says, "Sure, no problem." She then walks out of the store, happy with the purchase that she made.

Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken

whats the difference between a baby and an onion? no one cries when u chop up a baby.

A guy walks up to his boy and tells him, "Hey, if you don't stop masturbating you'll go blind." The boy says, "Who are you? Your not my father."

Little Johnny was walking through the park... only he had no legs. Little Johnny was raped later that day... while he bled out from him having his legs cut.

Yo momma so old that she has started to look into an affordable life insurance plan to ensure all her final expenses are taken care of.

whats the difference between a can and a fish?they can both swim. exept for the can.

what do you call the breaching of the anal cavity with a penis? butt sex

If you don't see banners here, it doesn't mean they are not there...

An Asian walks into a bar with his girlfriend He proceeds to buy himself and her food Pays Then leaves

Yo' mamas so fat that your friend said a yo mama so fat joke to you. You were certainly not amused.

Why did the magician die when he tried to escape from the handcuffs underwater? Because he drowned and failed his magic trick.

Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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