A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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1,2,3,4,5..what comes next? yeah you should know how to count

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A man takes his girlfriend ice skating on a lake. As they are ice skating she says "we should go back home and fu..." At this point they fall through a thin spot on the ice and they both drown in the lake. Fish ate their dead bodies

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What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

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1,000 people get out of a plane , who hits the ground first? The DEAD guy!!!!

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Why did anna stop wanting to build a snowman? Beacuse she died of cancer.

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why did little johnny start choking? because somebody shoved a bag down his throat

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What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table isn't a whore.

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Why doesn't Julius Caesar ever use a cell phone? Because he died in 44 BC.

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You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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Yo mama's so fat, she died of a mixture of obesity and type 1 diabetes.

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So mind telling me why you wont call me? And why, you know... Are you avoiding this condition of yours?

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Why did the monkey eat the banana? Because it was sexually confused

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What did one cannibal say to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

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My friend was waving a stick around and yelling out spells, so walked up to him and asked "You want to be Harry Potter, don't you?" He replied excitedly "Yeah!!" So i killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

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What do you get when you see a black man writing? A man devoted to getting a education.

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Hey look i just made a jo... shit.

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Why did the man trip over the kitten? He was blind.

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Knock knock, Who's there? Justin Bieber, LEAVE!

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what has two legs, and is red? half a cat.

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my penis

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Justing Bieber walks in a bar. Everyone shoots him.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a Playground in her back yard? Neither did she.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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