what did the monitor say to the boy? Im a Monitor

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What did the Jewish girl do when I asked for her number? Roll up her sleeve...

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? No one, because a hollowed out pineapple carcass would not be able to last longer than a month in that high concentration of sodium.

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What do you call a black man on the moon?? Never going to happen

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What did the homeless man find on the side of the street? A pile of dead babies.

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What is said about the man who is addicted to online gaming? He plays more than 5 hours per day and doesn't have any social contacts or whatsoever.

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A man walks into a bar. Splash.

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Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars? No, we can't.

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What is the funniest shirt Emil heskey has ever worn? A shirt that had this joke on it

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Allah walked into AK Bar

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Hey I just met you and this is crazy but here's my chew toy throw it maybe!

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Why was the little boy hit by a bus? I pushed him

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Does your iPod have zoom on it? Yeah, but it doesn't have a camera

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5 Italian guys from Long Island

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jim davidson , nick griffin , and bernard manning walk into a bar , and order a bitter, a lager, and a stout respectfully

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I am pleased and honored to hear you speak that beautifully straight from your heart Nero, you are without equal, unmatched. And he who is unmatched, also stands alone.

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What would Marylin Monroe be doing right now if she was alive? Clawing her way out of her coffin.

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Wanna hear a joke? Me neither.

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An alligator was found wearing a vest. The investigator had no comment... As alligators are incapable of speech. ^^^

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Chuck Norris was in a staring contest with the sun. He's blind now.

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A Man Gets Cancer He eventually Loses all his hair and drops dead

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know because he got hit by a car.

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A 10 year old underpriveledged boy goes to the second mile camp and meets his new counselor: Penn State defensive coordinator Jerry Sandusky. The two bond very much and talk a lot. Sandusky invites the boy back to the locker room to shower because the boy got muddy. The boy takes a shower, gets clean, and goes back to his cabin. The boy has a great time at the camp and goes home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops