Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

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What's black and at the top of a burning building? A paraplegic

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What does it say on the back of Superman`s cape on the "new" movie? My other actor was an awesome dude, all I got now is this asshole... Moral: Christopher Reeve... takes lasers... shotguns, eats lava with his cornflakes... falls of a horse... dies... Moral2: HEY What is the booing for? This is the ANTI JOKE! SECTION... but now to my sincerest thoughts... Moral 3: R.I.P Christohper Reeve, he lived and died with hope... Dying happy while suffering from one of the worst things that can happen to a human being, is an inspiration to us all! True superman!

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, But the very next day, I died.

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How did the frog fly? It drank a magic potion. How did the snake fly? It ate the frog How the the eagle fly? It already can.

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Whats more dangerous then a man with a gun? two men with guns.

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A man is on a military operation, he dies and has a funeral.

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Q: What is brown and sticky and often found in the grass? A: A stick.

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How do you stop a black man drowning? Take your foot off his head

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i know you talk the talk but can you talk the talk

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What's worse than a dead baby? A dumpster full of dead babies What's worse than that? One is still alive at the bottom What's worse than that? It had to eat its way out. What's worse than that? It came back for seconds

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Your uncle jack just helped you off a horse. Now it's your turn to help your uncle jack off a horse.

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A deaf man walks into a bar. Someone yells, "FIRE!" and everyone evacuates. The deaf man does not hear him and dies horribly.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

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Why did the mouse cross the road? Because he had been attached to the chicken with a nail gun.

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What happened to the gun that was jammed? It didn't shoot.

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How do you find your way out of the impossible maze? You don't.

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Whats hard and long and used to penetrate women? A hypodermic needle.

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Knock Knock. READ THE DAMN SIGN IT SAYS NO SOLICITORS!!! ... yeah.

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Two men and a woman go to lunch together at a restaurant in New York City. The first man says, "I'm glad that we're finally doing this." The second man says, "Yeah, me too." The woman concurs.

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What did the woman say to her abusive husband? You're hurting me.

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Do you know what the forest fire got for Christmas? Your house

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A naked man walks into a bar and is promptly arrested for indecent exposure.

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How does an elephant climb a cliff who cares

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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