What did the Jamacian say to his friends? Yo me Rastas' on de cloud shroud atta boy 9PM we rizzle into da hitasses bar and we order us da drink of "grandpa's cough medicince" me tinks, who grees wid my view od oftaday Rastas?

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupter. Interrupter who? Interrupter Jones.

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In Soviet Russia, this type of joke would be considered evidence to throw you into the gulag.

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Who created Apple? Steve jobs.

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What do you call a black man driving a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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Before Marriage: Boy: Ah at last. I can hardly wait. Girl: Do you want me to leave? Boy: No don't even think about it. Girl: Do you love me? Boy: Of Course. Always have and always will. Girl: Have you ever cheated on me? Boy: Never. Why are you even asking? Girl: Will you kiss me? Boy: Every chance I get. Girl: Will you hit me? Boy: Hell no. Are you crazy? Girl: Can I trust you? Boy: Yes. Girl: Darling! After Marriage: (Read from bottom to top)

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Why was Joe lying on the ground? Because he got shot.

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Q: What happens after you have sex with Michelle Obama? A: You wake up and kill yourself.

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Roses are gray Violets are gray I really wish That I wasn't color blind

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Daisies are red. WHY IS MY GARDEN ON FIRE?

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What's more irritating than a half eaten apple? Some prick taking up half the page with shitty copy and past routine.

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Dwarf Shortage

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What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

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Why did the chicken cross the road...

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Why doesn't Austin have sex? Because when his wife gets hot he puts dirt on her and hits her with a shovel

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What do you call a gay kid, a horrible singer, and has long hair for a guy? Justin Bieber

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Q: Why does it snow in Canada and not in Mexico? A: Because Canada is far from the equator and Mexico isn't.

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Why is Skrillex bad at fishing? Because he always increases the treble input in his songs, and he doesnt have a rod.

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Why did the woman come out of the kitchen? She didn't.

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How can you get a handicap black man to walk again? You don't...... Unless you motivate him with fried chicken. Anti-anti-joke!

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why did the baby fall down the steps? Because there was big earth quake that blocked his parents on the other side of the house, therefor leaving no one capable of getting to him befor falling

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A man walks into a bar and sees an attractive blonde. He is afraid of talking to her so he goes home and masterbates himself to sleep.

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Q: Why did the man eat the banana? A: Cuz he was hungry!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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