A fat man walks into a gym, and comes out fatter

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What happened to the homeless guy when a woman gave him five dollars? He shot the woman because he is mentally retarded.

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If life hands you lemons... Question yourself what just happened because life isn't tangible and has no way of handing you lemons, and even if it did, why lemons?

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A man walks into a bar. Three hours later, ambulances arrived, because the man was knocked out. The man who saved was known as a hero, and was awarded a medal for his good deed.

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Joe has 30 candy bars and eats 25. What does john have now? DIABETIES. Joe has diabeties. Please comment!!!!!!!

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What is the diffrence between you and I. I am not sure because i have not meet you yet

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What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

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Yo mama so stupid, she signed an apointment with Dr. Pepper

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Two men fought over a bag of peanuts. The peanuts won.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No? Neither have they.

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How do you get a Mexican's attention? "Excuse me, may I have your attention?"

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roses are red violets are blue you smell like poo I F*****G HATE YOU!

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Justing Bieber walks in a bar. Everyone shoots him.

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What do Barney and a butchers knife have in common? One of them is purple

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I found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school. I said, "Wow, I can't believe I just found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school." Later that day, my principal gassed the kindergarten classrooms with cyanide while shouting, "GO RAIDERS!"

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What's the difference between a good anti joke, and a bad anti joke? There literally is no good anti joke.

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Ask me if I'm a tree "are you a tree?" No

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A black woman was filling out forms at the welfare office. Under "Number of children," she wrote "10," and where it said "List names of children," she wrote "Leroy." When she handed in the form, the woman behind the desk pointed out: "Now here where it says "List names of children," you're supposed to write the names of each one of your children." "Dey all named Leroy," said the black woman. "That's very unusual. When you call them, how do they know which one you want?" asked the welfare worker. The Black woman said, "Oh, den I uses the middle names."

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So a Jew is walking on the street and he sees a penny, and he decides to pick it up because ever since the fire that killed his family and burned his house down he has been living on the street and he needs all the help he can get.

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A blonde walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What're you drinking?" The blonde says, "Nothing yet. That's why I'm in a bar. But your lack of basic observation skills is disturbing."

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What's black, white and red all over? A race war

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My former roomate had that game, about some bald guy that can slow down time, but thats like supernatural or something.

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Why do bats fly in circles? They're mentally retarded.

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Hello

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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