Why was the blonde walking funny? She had a ten foot long metal bar shoved up her butt, and it was very painful to walk.

What is yellow, has wheels, and lies on its back? A school bus in a terrible accident.

What did the father say to his son, who incidently shot his brother while they were playing with a gun home alone? "It happens." He then hung himself.

Why didn't Joey play with the other kids on the playground? Answer: He was dead

What's eighteen inches long, stiff, and makes women scream at night? A twelve inch long penis that is erect, thus adding approximately one half of its flaccid size, and involved in the act of fornication with the female partner of the man whose penis I am describing. (Of course, it is ignorant and juvenile to assume that the man in question is heterosexual. He may be a homosexual, which is perfectly acceptable in these liberal times we live in, or he may in fact be single and not inclined towards a sexual preference of any kind. This is understandable due to the myriad complications of long-term relationships, a result of the infinite differences between the masculine and feminine psyches.)

There were two penguin's sitting in a bathtub. The first penguin says to the second penguin, "Hey, pass the soap." And the second penguin says, "What do i look like, an alarm clock?"

Why did hitler cause the holocaust? YOLO

What's good about sex with twenty-three year olds? There's twenty of them.

What do you call a black man running really fast down a street? Active.

what do you call the breaching of the anal cavity with a penis? butt sex

Why are asians bad drivers? Driving schools in asia are severely less developed and therefore produce less experienced and skillful drivers. They also have asian eyes (:

What's faker than Nicki Minaj's tits? Women rights.

why did my BFF hate me?i called her an idiot on all the holidays including her birthday

Q:Whats worse then hard nipples A:The holocaust

What did the cop say to the speeding black man? "Can I see your license and registration?"

What do a reindeer and a grape have in common? They are both purple, except for the reindeer.

John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

roses are red violets are blue show me your bed i wanna fuck you oh and roses are red violets are blue nice tits.

The President walks into a local pub. Everyone shits their fricken pants because the President is here.

What did the boy with AIDS, polio, one eye and one arm get for Christmas? Cancer.

How do you stop a friendly bear from bouncing up and down on your front lawn? Shoot it in the neck.

i should have been sad when my flashlight died.... but i was delighted.

Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Clearly the only answer is because he's blind

A man did not like this site

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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