There was 2 friends named Shutup and Trouble. They were camping and Trouble got lost in the woods. Shutup called the police. Shutup: Hello, is this 9-1-1 my friend is missing. Police: What is your name sir? Shutup: Shut up Police: What? Shutup: Shut up Police: What did you say? Shutup: I said Shut Up Police: Hey are you looking for TROUBLE? Shutup: Yes! Police: Guess what? We found him, he's safe in the station. We will have a officer come by a drop him off. Have a good day Mr. Shutup Shutup: Thank you

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Why did the boy fall off the purple cliff? Because someone cut of his legs and arms and threw him off.

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Who let the dogs out? The dog's owner.

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What do you get when you cross a hamster with a zebra? A genetic abomination that you should put out of it's misery.

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A piece of paper got wet. I stuck it over the fireplace to dry off, but it lit on fire.

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what happens when you throw a green rock into a yellow pond. it makes a spash.

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What does a weasel and a naked college girl have in common? No clothes

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A plane crashes on the border of canada and america, where do you bury the survivors? I lied there are no survivors and the bodies were incinerated by burning jet fuel so theres nothing to bury.

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Okay.. So a dyslectic man walks into a bra...

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What do you get if Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus have a baby? The apocalypse

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So mind telling me why you wont call me? And why, you know... Are you avoiding this condition of yours?

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Is your refrigerator running? I hope so, or else the food will go bad!

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knock knock whos there the game __i lost the game__

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: Feces

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How did the Muslim pilot die? He had a fatal heart attack while flying over the Atlantic and as a result the 300 passengers died by drowning.

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Whats green has 4 legs and would kill someone if it fell out of a tree??? A pool table.....

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whats the same between a mouse and an elephant? They are both small except for the elephant

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A heavily drunk man walks into a bar and proceeds to die of alcohol poisoning.

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Q: Why did princess Diana crops the road? A: Because she wasn't wearing a seatbelt

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what did the dog say to the mailman? "hey thanks for the mail" the mailman replies "your welcome"

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Dries Roelvink walks into a bar...

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have fetal alcohol syndrome."

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No? Neither have they.

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A farmer accidentally trips his wife. She falls down the stairs and the farmer is quickly arrested for murder.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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