How do I become successful like you dad? Just do good.

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Your mamma so fat she bungie jumped straight to hell

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why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms why did suzie get hit by a bus? she was blind knock knock whos there? not suzie.

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Why can't the orphan play baseball? He can't find home.

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Whats green and fuzzy and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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I walk in to a bar, ask for a beer, get drunk, walk away and.... hmmm.. how could I finish the joke??..

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Why was the blackman fired from his job? Beacuse he was late too many times which was unacceptable.

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What do you call five black me pushing a car? "Very nice young men who helped me when I broke down," according to my grandmother.

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why did stuart buy an ipad from the mall. because he wanted an ipad

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Your momma is so ugly that when she stepped on the mirror, it broke.

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What happens when Lord Voldemort tries to kill Harry Potter? He is unsuccessful.

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What did the fat man say to everyone? Hey everyone! I am i fat man!

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

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Did you hear about the guy that had his entire left side cut off? He's all right now. Dead but all right.

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Why did the Grizzly bear refrain from attacking the hiker? It didn't. The hiker was torn to shreds within minutes.

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Hey man, you the tall one! Yes? Do you understand me? No. But you do overstand me right? Yeah, I overstand most people.

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What is big white and will kill you if it falls out of a tree in winter A refrigerator

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what did the food critic say when he was handed a snickers? I'm allergic to peanut butter

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When is a Jewish persons bedtime? When the brain releases endorphins, causing drowsiness, which usually leads one to sleep.

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What's the one thing America's got but the UK hasn't... School shootings

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There was 3 friends named Crap, Manners, and Shut up. They all had mental mothers.

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Why did dallin fall off the swing he got hit by jds big penis

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How does Helen Keller play the piano? With one hand.. She needs the other hand to sing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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