What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

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Why didn't the 1 month old chicken cross the road? Because by that time it's already a Mcnugget.

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Two gay guys are cuddling in a park when they spot a hot, busty blonde jogging near them. One turns to the other and says, "Damn... It's days like this I wish I was a lesbian."

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There once lived a man in Peru. He lived in a small apartment then died of kidney failure.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Poop. Poop who? HAHAHAHAHAHA you said poopoo

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Q: How did the dead baby get to the other side of the road? A: I threw it over there.

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Why can't Timmy go on any rollercoasters? Because he's morbidly obese and it would a safety hazard.

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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Jimmy's mom: Jimmy go do your chores now!! Jimmy: You shut your mouth, whore. Get your smelly ass back in the kitchen!!!

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Do you know what the forest fire got for Christmas? Your house

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Why do bats fly in circles? They're mentally retarded.

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Why did the young boy hit the other young boy? Because the other young boy was bullying his friend and he thought it was time he should stand up for himself and take control of the situation.

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Roses are red, Violates are blue. I have an erection, and its lasted more then three hours

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Youu might be a Jew if you........take part in a weekly service at your local synagogue.

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'How do you make a plumber cry? Buy him a belt for Christmas.

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Two men and a woman go to lunch together at a restaurant in New York City. The first man says, "I'm glad that we're finally doing this." The second man says, "Yeah, me too." The woman concurs.

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A blond, burnette, and red head walk into a bar. They sit together and enjoy a few drinks while catching up on eachother's lives.

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What did Jesus say to the jews? Fuck you.

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Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, But the very next day, I died.

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Why couldn't the black man get out of jail? He couldn't post his bond.

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whats the same between a mouse and an elephant? They are both small except for the elephant

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why couldn't the girl watch t.v? Because her house burned down

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What did Elmer Fudd say when Bugs Bunny got away again? "Oh, dat dawn wabbit, I'ww get it some day".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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