What did the white man say to the black bartender? I'll have a pint please.

A man walked up to a fork in the road. He bent down, picked it up, and continued on his journey.

What do you call 1000 black men walking down a street? The million man march

whats the diferrence between a bush and an old lady? it be wierd if a bush had an old lady.

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

What is an anti joke? It's jokes about jews, blacks, and walking out of bars LIKE AN IRISHMAN

Q: Why did Sarah fall off the swings? A: She had no arms Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

What is the oppisite of water? Dry!

Man goes to doctor, says he's depressed. The world is bleak and hopeless and life just isn't worth living. The doctor thinks for a second then smiles. "Treatment is simple he says, the great clown Pagliacci is in town. Go see him, that should pick you up." The man bursts into tears, sobs hysterically like a child, "But doctor," he says. "I am Pagliacci."

Why was David enjoying his cream of mushroom soup? Because David had spent the last 17 days eating flouescent light fix-ins.

David walks into a bar. Someone shoots him. Now hes dead.

Why did the chicken cross the road? it doesn't matter, it got turned into KFC before it crossed.

What is worse than torturing, "forcibly penetrate" and then slowly and painfully kill nine billion people? The Holocaust?

Why did the black man cross the road? he just wanted to cross the road, racist. ... after he had robbed a bank

cool

What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

Where would canada be without nature? still here

What's the difference between a dead baby and my dinner??? Nothing...

Why did the fat girl stop eating? She wasn't hungry.

How many blondes does it take to screw a lightbulb? There's too little information to come up with a reasonable answer.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

There are only three kind of people: people who can count and people that can't count

What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

Why did the girl fall off of the swings? Because I threw a refrigerator at her.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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