What's the differrence between a park bench and a black person... A park bench can support a family

thumb_up thumb_down -40

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You just glass her.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q: what do you call a black guy on the moon A: An astronaut you resist bastard

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Guess what? You just lost the game.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

The jinx machine just stole your money... ... this poem was supposed to be funny

thumb_up thumb_down -42

What is the same about a bird and a turtle? They can both fly . . . except for the turtle

thumb_up thumb_down +181

Wanna hear an inside joke? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why do women fake orgasms? Because they want to give men the impression that they have climaxed.

thumb_up thumb_down +70

What did the african american ninja say to the jewish bartender? Can I have a beer?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's more fun than nailing babies to a wall? Ripping them off again.

thumb_up thumb_down -78

What did the 16 year old boy say to the obese girl who failed at typing? "sucks for you bitch-face."

thumb_up thumb_down -32

A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "what can I get you?" The man replies "what do you recommend?" The bartender says "get a beer." The man says "okay."

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Ask me if I am an orange. "Are you an orange?" No.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Roses are red Violets are blue You touch yourself. I do, too.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's black and blue and red all over? Due to the infinite nature of the universe many items both natural and manufactured could be described in this manner.

thumb_up thumb_down +187

So I was making this bagel right?And my dad walks in while I'm making this bagel(cause we're in a rush you know?) and he's yells"HURRY UP!!!!"I'm like man.... I sure do got alot of YELL in my bagel .

thumb_up thumb_down -165

Knock Knock Dude i am not going to answer the door

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Two guys jump off a cliff... the third guy calls an ambulance.

thumb_up thumb_down -56

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, Fuzzy Wuzzy had cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +229

Why was the boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A man walks into a bar and says "ouch". The nearby patrons ask him what is ailing him.

thumb_up thumb_down +122

I would write a joke, but it wouldn't be funny

thumb_up thumb_down -28

A dog goes into a bar. He is wearing an eye patch. The dog says to the bartender, "Have you heard the one about the one-eyed dog?" The bartender, who is deaf in one ear, thinks the dog is making fun of him. He asks him to leave. The dog says, "Don't you have a sense of humor, deafie?" At the end of his shift, the bartender is tired of all the jokes. Today it's a one-eyed dog. Yesterday it was a horse with rickets. The day before: ants. He lives above the bar, in a small room. He spends the night alone there, listing to his battery operated radio, which picks up only a bad jazz station. He listens to bad jazz with his bad ear.

thumb_up thumb_down -72

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops