I would write a joke, but it wouldn't be funny

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, Fuzzy Wuzzy had cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +219

What's the difference between a Jew and a canoe? One is a person of Jewish descent and the other is a device for traversing waterways akin to the raft.

thumb_up thumb_down +171

A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, He said 'No'. She asked him if he would want to be with her forever. He said 'no'. She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, Once again, he replied 'no'. She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said.. 'Asking emotionally charged hypothetical questions that are completely irrelevant to the prior conversation can be known as fishing for compliments or reassurance of your value as a human being. Except, your tears seem to reflect a more serious inner emotional neediness. I suggest you seek a psychologist.'

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's the differrence between a park bench and a black person... A park bench can support a family

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Whats the difference between the floor and the ceiling? One of them is higher!

thumb_up thumb_down -32

The jinx machine just stole your money... ... this poem was supposed to be funny

thumb_up thumb_down -42

What's the best part of having sex with twenty-eight year olds? There's twenty of them.

thumb_up thumb_down -78

A man walks into a bar and says "ouch". The nearby patrons ask him what is ailing him.

thumb_up thumb_down +111

A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "what can I get you?" The man replies "what do you recommend?" The bartender says "get a beer." The man says "okay."

thumb_up thumb_down +23

I used to be a Businessman like you, then I took a plane to the North Tower.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: The farmer decided it was too cruel to fence in the animal, however getting run over by a car was a fate... not worse than death because it died.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Q: what do you call a black guy on the moon A: An astronaut you resist bastard

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why couldn't Jimmy ride a bike Because Jimmy was a fish

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the 16 year old boy say to the obese girl who failed at typing? "sucks for you bitch-face."

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What's more fun than nailing babies to a wall? Ripping them off again.

thumb_up thumb_down -78

A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

thumb_up thumb_down +157

Theres 3 guys walking and the see a genie. He says hell grant 3 wishes. The first guy asked for sandals. The genie said"I can do that" and he got sandals. The second guy asked for rock hard abs.The genie said,"sure thing".When he looked down, he saw that he had rock hard abs. The third guy asked for a pair of pants."ok" Said the genie. And then he got a pair of pants.

thumb_up thumb_down +129

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You just glass her.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

28

thumb_up thumb_down +56

Q: why is the squirrel stuck in the tree? A: because he should have finished high school.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Q., Why did you mum eat mum on ur mom go die mom niga nigga cut me hang me lolololo A.my cat died shut up newb lololololo

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's grosser than gross? Grossest.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Robert dupras dick size :3

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops