A man walks into his cubicle and sits down. After a long day of work, he goes home and happens to die whilst eating dinner.

So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

What's sad about a girl getting hit in the face with a shovel? The shovel got dented..

What did the homeless man buy with a dollar? Nothing. He didn't have a dollar.

I'm not hungry, so when my mon offered me a pear I said to her "No thanks, I'm not hungry". 

A black person and a white person decide to have a race. Who won? The white person Don't be a racist.

Knock Knock Who's There? Poop. Poop who? HAHAHAHAHAHA you said poopoo

Why did Sarah fall of the swing... She had no arms. Knock knock, who's there... Not Sarah. Face Face, who's there... Probably Sarah.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

A guy walked into a bar a hundred years ago and but a pint of whiskey. He is dead now.?

Why did the Asian student do well in school? Because he worked hard and studied everyday

2 biggest lies I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service and That baby dont look like me

What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

A horse and a penguin and a kangaroo come into a bar and order drinks from the bartender, who later gets fired for taking acid while working.

Scenario: Two guys are out hunting. Two guys are walking and a one falls down. The other calls 911 and the guy still standing asks what to do. The person at the hospital told him to make sure his friend was dead, then heard a gunshot. The guy who called said "Now what do I do?"

What do you get when you cross a Minotaur with a snowman? A cold mythological creature.

Why did the blonde run into a screen door? Because screen doors are difficult to see when one is running at full speed

A man went to his doctor and said, "Doctor, every time I hit my hand with a hammer, it hurts!" Then both him and his doctor died; so it didn't matter.

How do you find the richest person in Mexico? You get the census of income per citizen and see who is at the top.

it

Why is the dog in the driver seat? Why is there birds making you filet mignon? Why is your toe blue? I don't know the answer. Go talk to your doctor

Knock Knock. Who's there? Irune. Irune who? Irune my life with all this red sand.

What do you call a griraffe and a duck who's favorite colors are both purple? A coincidence in which two unrelated species have the same preference in colorant hues.

Knock Knock Who's There Mailman Mailman who? Sir, I don't have time for this, take your mail.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...