If people are freaking out about this Kony guy I cant wiat to see the look on their faces when they check in my crawl space.

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How do you help a one-armed man down from a tree? Wave.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get up? She had no legs. Why did noone help her up? She was fat.

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What did batman say to robin before they got into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

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What did God say to Abraham? Nothing, because God doesn't exist.

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Did you hear the one about the koala bear that fell out of the tree? Yeah it died.

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Wanna hear a joke? Zeke friends Wanna hear a better jokes? Zeke with his friends

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What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

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How did the black man get a nice car? He spent 8 years of his life getting a doctorate so he could be hired at a job that will pay for his desired vehicle.

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A dog with toothpaste in it's mouth wanders into a bar. The bartender beats it to death, because he thought it had rabies.

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If life hands you melons you might be dyslexic

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Why did t chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock, knock. Who's there? The chicken

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White men's rights

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black I'm blind

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What did the man do with the naked baby girl? He put some clothes on her and proceded to lay her down for a nap.

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So Nero, do we tell people your comments are all containing codes and stuff so we can stay in touch?

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What's worse than a dead baby? Two dead babies.

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The original Moral Man has left Horsehead network, but I will keep monitoring this section for like 3 hours... Then probably never again on this shit site it barely works ffs! Moral: "Turn every stone, and you might find a penny, turn every penny and you might find a stone that stone is in our shoe, kick it away, crush it, destroy it"

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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How did the baby survive the car accident? He didn't. He was killed on impact.

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Songs can be interpreted in many different ways you know: "Whenever, Wherever" - Prostitution "You raise me up" could be an advert for Viagra; And as for "love is in the air" - masturbating from a rooftop comes to mind. [L]

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What animal was two legs and bleeds a lot? half a dog

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A man crossed the road. A chicken stood in a doorway smoking a cigarette wondering why whenever he crosses the street his motives are always questioned yet men and other animals are allowed to go about their day normally. END CHICKEN DISCRIMINATION NOW!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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