Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

Who would win if Chuck Norris and God fought to the death? None they are both fictional.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to

Michael Jackson and Barack Obama talked to each other about oreos

Why did the boy fall off his bike? His mother threw a brick at him.

Dwarf Shortage

Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your pear.

Three blokes walk into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid, and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability

A man came home and witnessed his wife having an affair with another man. The husband and wife got into a huge argument and eventually got divorced

Why was the black person assassinated behind a drug dealers house? He was purposely shot in the leg and bled out before he could make it to help.

Whats the difference between a kangaroo and a kangeroot ? Ones a marsupial. The others a Geordie stuck in a lift.

whats funny about four dead horses in a park ? the horses are dead!

What did the farmer say to the chicken? Nothing, the farmer was arrested for having sex with a chicken.

Yo momma so fat that she was diagnosed with obesity and may need medical assistance in the future and will be reliant on you, her child.

Why did the African boy die? He was denied any antibiotics to heal his severe case of mono and AIDS, and was living on dirty water and dirt.

What's black and white and red all over? A dead Zebra

A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

A man that says YOU SUCK MY DICK YEAH!finds a woman that says YOU SUCK MY BOOB YEAH!They get married,The woman is actually a gay man!

Why couldn't the driver start his car? Because the driver was a tree

Knock Knock Who's there? You have AIDS.

All the other kids with the pumped up kicks died in a school shooting.

A boy plays in his garden. Then he fall and his knee hurts a lot, but he doesn't cry. Do you know why? Because he's dead.

Hey i just met you and this is crazy, but heres my gamertag so party up maybe?

Roses are red Violets are Blue Let's just screw

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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