Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

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what do you get when you cross a baby and a car a baby shaped dent, and a dead baby

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how do you know when you've had too much to drink? . . . when you're dead.

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What do black people and bananas have in common? 50% of their DNA

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q: what do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex? a: sex, just like everyome else calls it

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Why was Michael Jackson so bad at dancing? Because he had a broken leg.

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There was a blonde, brunette and red head driving in a car. The car breaks down so the three of them decide to walk. So the red head takes water bottles, the brunette takes food and the blonde took the car. The red head asked the brunette why she was taking the food, the brunette said "incase i get hungry i can eat" then the brunette asked the red head why she brought water the red head said "incase i get thirsty i can have a drink. Then the brunette asked the blonde why she brought the car the blonde said "to drive home".

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because, it realized that it was worth something in life, it had a meaning, a purpose, and a right to freedom, to go where it pleased. The chicken's first act of this freedom was to go across the street.

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There's a black guy, a yellow guy, and a white guy. Which one survives? All of them do. See. I'm not racist!

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A man walks into a bar, asks for a drink. He then realises that it was a metal bar and not one that serves alcoholic beverages. He then ponders the mysteries of the world and the universe.

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Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the barber shop, which was located on the other side of the road. He then walked to the crosswalk, patiently waited, then crossed when the little person lit up.

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What starts with "P" and ends with "orn"? Popcorn

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your mother is so heavily obese, she became one of the 60 million individuals in America who are obese today.

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did you hear about the guy who got his left leg and left arm cut off? he's all right now

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Who cut the cheese? It's sliced so evenly.

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Why should you never shower with a pokemon? Pokemon is a game for children. In doing so you would greatly disturb your child who is quite fond of pokemon

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Roses are Blue Violets are Red Watermelons are green Refridgerator

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Tiger woods is a famous golf player and Santa is a fictional old man dressed in red and white who is said to live in Lapland, have an airborne sleigh driven by eight magical reindeer and come down the chimney to fill childrens' stockings on Christmas eve.

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Whats really ugly and horny Jake's mom

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What do you call a deer with no eye? No eye deer ( get it, it's like the red, necked southern speaking states )

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A girl asks a Croatian bartender for a beer, the bartender replies, 'There is no beer in this bar.'

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Yo momma so old that she has started to look into an affordable life insurance plan to ensure all her final expenses are taken care of.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Hitler.

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Josh brown loves Jessica Potts from Dylan xoxo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops