Why did the baby cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

How do you rape someone? No, its a question. I don't know the best way to go about this.

My wife asked me to prepare our son for his first day of school. He's a ginger so I punched him in the face, and stole his lunch money.

HOw do u DEFeat thE hatErsz shitted on em

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite

ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE HERE'S A KNIFE KILL YOURSELF KANE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What do you call a black man carrying a T.V? Someone that is helping me move.

How does a Welshman take a shit? Like anyone other human being does.

Did you hear about the guy that had his entire left side cut off? He's all right now. Dead but all right.

rodents are bed violents are glue i have lysdexia and short attention spa

Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

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Where did Little Johnny go when the bomb hit? Everywhere.

Hey, you know what would be funny? A joke.

what's funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? Pretty much anything because infant mortality is in no way funny

Why was the blackman fired from his job? Beacuse he was late too many times which was unacceptable.

a man was beating his wife his wife asks him to stop he says no and continues beating her

What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not answer because he is a horse, and neither speaks nor understands the english language. He looks around, and is confused by his surrondings. He gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

What do you call five black me pushing a car? "Very nice young men who helped me when I broke down," according to my grandmother.

Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bench? a bench is a structure designed for sitting and a Mexican is a person born in Mexico.

What's blck and blue and doesn't like sex? The ten year old in my car.

roses are red, violets are blue, hes for me not for you, if by chance you take me place, ill take my fist, and smarsh your face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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