Whats green has 4 legs and would kill someone if it fell out of a tree??? A pool table.....

thumb_up thumb_down +5

MURRRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Yo mama so fat when she goes to the gym, she makes her trainer skinnier.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q: why did the white man buy a burge A: cuz he was hungry

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Where did the two Jews ride when they got married? In the back of the oven.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Whats grey and kills people, Terminal cancer,I lied about the grey color

thumb_up thumb_down +5

yo mommas so poor she doesn't live in a house

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, what can I get you?" He is then checked into the psychiatric ward at the local hospital, for talking to a duck.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A man walks into a bar and orders a strong drink Bartender: Why the long face Man: My wife was recently killed in a horrible car accident Bartender: Oh my god, I'm so sorry Man: Jks I have AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A man carrying a bucket of golf clubs walks into a bar with a blonde, a brunette, and an asian. His name was Tiger Woods.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q: What do you brush your teeth with, sit on and sleep in? A: A toothbrush, a chair and a bed

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Roses are red,Violets are blue, Who the hell are you,Get the hell away

thumb_up thumb_down +5

KANE TUCKER HAS A CHODE THE SIZE OF HIS FINGER NAIL

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you call a black man with a guitar? His name

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's worst than finding a worm in your apple Finding half a worm in your apple .....

thumb_up thumb_down +5

This is SPARTA! SPARTA? THIS IS MADNESS! (kicks guy down well) What is hurt! Baby dont love me, dont love me, no more. Moral: The funny thing is probably that the line makes a lot more sense all of sudden does it not?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? As Suzy neared the ground while swinging, her foot caught a small hole in the swingset's pebble foundation, and the power of Suzy's momentum along with the sudden stop of Suzy's swing forced Suzy to fly forward off of the swing. Suzy, seeing the silliness of her mistake, laughed it off, and tried to get back up. She quickly realized that her leg had snapped in half. Suzy will never walk again.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What was so sad about the white woman who dropped her Starbucks? It fell on her baby in a nearby stroller giving it third degree burns, disfiguring its face.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Two strawberries are sitting in a bathtub. One says to the other, "Can you pass the soap?" The other one says, "What do I look like, a typewriter?!"

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Joe: Hey, why are your counters all red and your blender looks broken? Me: The same reason why Mrs. Johnson's baby is missing. ajl

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? No one knows.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

This planking craze is really taking over... my elderly nextdoor neighbour has been planking in her garden for three days straight!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What bouriquet got to do open HIS FACEBOOK!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops