What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot you racist! Jk a terrorist

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Q: What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A: Caner.

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what do chinese kids make for fathers day? shoes

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A duck walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender doesn't understand him because he doesn't speak duck and promptly calls animal control to have the duck removed.

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An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

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Knock knock. Whos there? I am you dumbass im standing right next to you.

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did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No reason.

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Horse walks into a bar. 'The barman says 'why the long face?' The horse says 'I've got cancer'.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your mother. Please open the door. Your mother who? You were adopted.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What happens when you throw a red rock into a blue ocean. The rock gets wet.

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How much does a dead baby weight? the same amount when it was alive!

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Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

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There was 3 friends named Crap, Manners, and Shut up. They all had mental mothers.

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What do Kobe Bryant and a toaster have in common? They both rape white women. Except for the toaster.

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A. why'd the chicken cross the road? B.a dog got hit by a bus.

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Two peanuts were walking down the street..........pepper.

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A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

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Why can't Hellen Keller have kids? Because she's dead, therefore does not possess the ability to bear children.

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Q: Why should you never let Jerry Sandusky babysit your children? A: Because, in November of 2011, Sandusky was arrested and charged with 40 counts of sexual abuse of young boys over a 15-year period. A man with this type of background does not seem like a an ideal choice for a babysitter.

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guess what? bannanas

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Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

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How many black people does it take to solve a complex physics equation? Trick question

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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