A young boy walked into a hardware store and asked for a long weight. Luckily, the shop owner was kindly and brought the child up to speed on the process of hazing.

Why did the catfish cross the road? Catfish can't walk.

When my parents said that they chucked a flipper baby into the Atlantic ocean I assumed a baby seal, I later found out that happened to my disabled brother.

knock knock whoses there whose home whoses home who? you

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dead one.

So there was this kid who was sitting on a stool, and the stool started moving. He then realized that stools do not move, so he got up and ran away as quickly as he could.

A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink, then walks out of the bar.

A muslim gets on an airplane and takes his seat. The plane lands safely and he enjoys his vacation in Florida.

What's nappy,brown,intoxicated,and stealing my bike? A Blazed, black guy that stole my bike.

A black guy and a Mexican are sitting in a car who's driving??? The Cops

An irishman walks into a bar and drinks 6 pints of guiness. He then drives himself home and savagely beats his wife and children.

Why did the boy fall off the purple cliff? Because someone cut of his legs and arms and threw him off.

So, Ryan Dunn was driving under the influence of alcohol. The result of this action proved to be fatal for both Ryan and his passenger; who happened to be his close and personal friend.

A Man Gets Cancer He eventually Loses all his hair and drops dead

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

Q why was John bullied A Becuase he told kids that bullying was a bad and serious problem to get them to stop bullying jimmy unfortunately Jimmy killed himself because he was bullied to much and didn't want to live.

how do you make a plumber cry? you kill his family!

The President walks into a local pub. Everyone shits their fricken pants because the President is here.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to escape the evil villains in giant mech suits.

Why did the boy drop his peanuts and crackerjacks? He had a sudden heart attack and died at the age of 10

Why did the guy go to the store? He really doesn't want you to know every detail of his life.

What's the difference between a panda and a baby? I don't have a baby in my freezer

What do you call a Muslim flying an airplane? A pilot, what did you think it was? F**king Racist dumbass

there are two muffins in an oven one muffin says "whoa, its hot in here!" the other says nothing, because it is a muffin, and the other muffin, in reality, said nothing either.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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