Q: How many Babies does it take to paint a garage? A: babies do not have good motor skills therefore, they can not hold a paint brush.

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How did the failing slut get an A -she studied really hard

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Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They got in a crash and died.

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Q: Whats worse than dropping your ice cream? A: Dropping two ice creams. Q: Whats worse than dropping two ice creams? A: The Holocaust. Q: Whats worse than the Holocaust? A: Dropping three ice creams.

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Think of a number, add it by 7, subtract it by 2, and multiply it by 4. Now close your eyes, isn't it dark?

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Why did the Polish man cross the road? Because the doctors was across the road, and he had a doctor appointment in five minutes time.

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Why was Cinderella so bad at ball? Isn't that sexist, making assumptions about Cinderella's sports capability when you have never seen her play sports before (because she is a fictional character) and then asking why this is true when you have no proof that it is in fact true? But I would guess the correct answer is (if she is bad at ball in the first place) that she never played ball before. Think about it. Why did you have to ask this question at all? Isn't it obvious?

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What red, white, and blue? A white person who was raped by a clown.

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What does a spider Pig do? Nothing. They dont exist.

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What did the penguin do in the desert? Die.

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What did the cat say to the dog before chasing each other You have a nice looking ass

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Roses are red Violets are actually the color violet, contrary to popular belief.

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Knock Knock I have a door bell It's broken Oh

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The only positive thing in my life, is the HIV test! Lymmel

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If Oscar Meyer had a dog what kind of dog would it be? A Wiener Dog!!

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Whats the best way to tell if your wife has been cheating on you with the UPS guy? simply ask her, trust and communication in relationships are vital in their survival and growth.

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What's better than winning a million dollars? Winning 2 million dollars!

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A Priest and a Rabbi walk into a bar together. They discuss the fundamentals and aspects of Religion.

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Theres a blonde and a brunette at a party. The redhead is left out because she has no soul.

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Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Holy shit a talking Muffin."

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Knock, knock! Who's there? No one. No one actually knocked on your door because this is just a joke.

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Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

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Why did the bear turn red? Because I fucking stabbed it!

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Knock Knock Whos there? Knock knock? Whos there? Knock knock. WHOS IS THERE?!?!? Knock Knock is, my name is Knock Knock.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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