How did little jimmy survive the plane crash? He ate all the survivors, then when the helicopter arrived he ate them too and took the helicopter.

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Where can I find a good Prostitute? Your Parents House.

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My mom

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So you keep your knowledge sharp do you? When it comes to hypnosis and such?

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God Nero, Marry me now! I removed the nose thingie but it wont stop.

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God, you know after creating humanity and kinda regretting it and stuff, fell into drinking and betting. He found Sin a fellow poker player, and all was good. Until God, drinking a bit too much bet a bit too many of his creds: Son. Jesus: Yes father. God: Uh, I kinda ended up low on cash on the poker game last night and I kinda well... I am gonna be frank here, I bet you and lost. NeroMetal Not dissing the bible, just enjoying the always brighter side of life eh? ;)

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How do you get a baby to be quiet? Put it in the oven for a few minutes

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How did the black man survive the Train crash? He didnt, he died liked everyone else

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If I were in a room with you, Hitler, Stalin, and Palin, and I had a gun with 3 bullets in it, I would drop that gun and run as fast as I could from that room. Sorry, I hate you!

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Wanna hear a joke? Womens rights ;) Wanna hear another joke? Too bad i'm not gonna tell you

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got Alzheimer's, Who are you?

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Have you heard about the constipated mathematician? He worked his problems out with a pencil... It was a #2 pencil

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why didnt the old man go to his sons birthday he died.........nah i lied he went went

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How do you kill a blonde? Kick her off a cliff.

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What did the little boy say before he succumbed to cancer? Nothing. It was too painful.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? A Holocaust in your apple.

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that green thing is not a leaf, it's my sister

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69 :) 3====D:). [{}]:)

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What is the connection between a blonde and a halogen headlamp? There is none, one is a female human being with blonde hair and the other is a headlamp with a halogen lightbulb.

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Q:What's the difference between a lake? A: a tree, because motorcycles dont have doors... :) crf

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Q:Why did the kid drop his ice cream A:He was hit by a car

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what has 2 legs and bleeds? Half a dog.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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What's worse than losing your job? Getting repeatedly hit in the face with a brick after getting fired from your job.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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