- Anti Joke

Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, most likely nobody

Knock knock. Who's there? There's no need to ask this question due to the fact that most homes are built with peepholes nowadays.

Why are kids with Aspergers Syndrome always banned from Mcdonalds? Let me repeat that: Ass Burgers.

A horse walks into a bar, the bar tender says" why the long face". The horse, unable to comprehend English just shits on the floor and leaves

why didn't sue come to her son's baseball game? because he doesn't play baseball, he lost his arms in a horrible plane crash. besides, sue died in that accident anyway.

Whats black and white and red all over? My wife, i constantly beat her and I should probably be arrested for it if she didnt love me so much

There is a hawk and a squirrel sitting in a tree. a farmer walks by with a strange package so the hawk turns to the squirrel and says nothing because he is an animal and incapable of speech, he then eats the squirrel because he is a bird of prey.

Q: what's worse than getting the flu? A: getting cancer

Why was the dog barking? Because I lit him on fire.

Yo mamma so fat she has to have anti biotics to keep her alive

How many people are in the world? More than one. -David Papile

What do you get when you cross a gay man with a chainsaw? A decapitated homosexual.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 brutally murdered 6's entire family.

Q: What would happen if Chuck Norris was hit by an Astroid A: He would die.

Your uncle jack just helped you off a horse. Now it's your turn to help your uncle jack off a horse.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, most likely nobody

Knock Knock Who's there? Sorry, wrong house.

wheres an unexpected place to find sand? a human pancreas.

What's worse than aids? Being a virgin.

Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a bus

Knock Knock. Who's There? I don't know. I'm paralyzed.

I'm not saying my mother-in-law is fat, because she is anorexic.

Why was the man white? Because he wasn't black. All credit goes to Caravel.

What's disabled and red all over. The kid I hit with my car.

Person 1: I'm really sleepy. Person 2: Then go to sleep.